Loving God Completely

The first thing I want to acknowledge and praise God for this month is for a beautiful granddaughter, Clara Kathryn, born January 30 to Wyatt and Laurel. She joins her big brother, Preston, who will be 3 on March 14. Grandchildren are so much fun and such a blessing! I wish that I could post a picture here, but I haven't learned how to do that yet.

The Lord has been teaching me so much lately that it was hard to know what to share. As there continue to be more and more things clamoring for our attention these days, these familiar verses came to my mind from Matthew 22:37-39. "Jesus replied: "Love the Lord your God with all our heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: "Love your neighbor as yourself." I've heard these verses many times, but the Lord has been asking me how I'm doing at obeying them. We know many of the verses from His Word, but the key question is are we obeying them. The life application Bible helps say "Jesus says that if we truly love God and our neighbor, we will naturally keep the commandments. This is looking at God's law positively. Rather than worrying about all we should not do, we should concentrate on all we can do to show our love for God and others." Matthew 23:11-12 further illustrates how we can love in this way. "The greater among you will be your servant. For whoever exalts himself will be humbled and whoever humbles himself will be exalted." Again, from the life application helps--"Jesus challenged society's norms. To Him, greatness comes from serving--giving of yourself to help God and others. Service keeps us aware of other's needs, and it stops us from focusing only on ourselves. Jesus came as a servant. What kind of greatness do you seek? Wow, what a challenge! Our world says the opposite--look out for yourself first and only help others if they can benefit you in some way.

In order to love the Lord with all of our heart, soul and mind, we have to get to know Him and make our relationship with Him our first priority. Making time for Him has to be our focus. In order to do that we have to evaluate where and how we spend our time. I'm currently in a Bible study by Cynthia Heald called "Becoming a Woman of Simplicity." Her words say better than I can what the Lord has been teaching me. "Daily we encounter a potent enemy. The world blazenly imposes its values on its citizens--wealth, success, productivity, ambition, pride, and busyness. Calendars and clocks rule while possessions, phones, and computers clamor for attention. Maggie Jackson, author of "Distracted", tells of a father who describes his daughter as being "surgically connected" to her cellphone. Cynthia goes on to say and I agree with her "My concern is that because the world is too much with us, we easily forfeit the blessing of living a God-paced life that has time for solitude and respite from our noisy world. It is our time spent quietly in His presence that transforms our minds and renews our strength to go back into the world to be the people He wants us to be. One way to have more discretionary time is to make hard choices concerning our possessions. Jesus taught "Beware! Guard against every kind of greed. Life is not measured by how much you own." (Luke 12:15). Cynthia goes on to tell of someone who had to temporarily move from her home to a small furnished apartment. When ask how she was coping with having less, she enthusiastically told how much more time she had because of less to take care of as well as how amazed she was that she didn't miss all the things she had to leave behind. Less stuff does mean more time--more time to spend with Jesus and to serve others.

Psalm 4:6-8 from the Message says:

"Why is everyone hungry for more? "More, more," they say "More, more".

I have God's more-than-enough.

More joy in one ordinary day

Than they get in all their shopping sprees.

At days end I'm ready for sound sleep,

For you, God, have put my life together.

As I've mentioned before in previous blogs, I can say amen to those verses because I've experienced both ways of living. When I was trying to find contentment in the things that the world says would bring contentment, it only led to more shopping and sleepless nights because I was never satisfied. Now Jesus fills up my heart with more of Himself as I choose to put Him first and focus on getting to know Him through His love letter to me, the Bible. Because of that He does give me more joy in one ordinary day that any of my shopping trips (always wanting more) did. Also, because of my intimate, personal relationship with Him, I am now content and can sleep peacefully. Only Jesus can bring contentment and therefore thankfulness for the many things and relationships that you already have instead of a continual desire for what you don't have.

Cynthia Heald goes on to say, "Scripture teaches us that love for the world can easily replace our love for the Father. This is why Jesus taught us to seek first His kingdom. Only when our hearts are set on the things of God are we able to respond in the right way to the lure of the world. Only when we trust God to provide for us can we be free from worry. Only when we allow the Holy Spirit to renew our thoughts and attitudes can we be in the world but not of it. It is so tempting to love what the world loves, but when we do yield, we miss out on sound sleep and having God put our lives back together on a daily basis--we miss out on living a life of pure and simple devotion to Christ."

My challenge to you as well as to myself is to look at your lives this week--to evaluate how you spend your time and where your heart, soul, and mind is focused--on loving Jesus and getting to know Him better and caring for others or on allowing the world to squeeze you into its mold by keeping you so busy that you have no time to receive God's rest and peace. As I continue to choose(it's always a choice--everyday--sometimes many times a day) to read and believe God's many promises to me from His Word and to share my heart with Him. As I do that, I get to know Him better and trust Him more. Only then can I (with the power of the Holy Spirit) love Him with all my heart, soul, and mind and love and care for others as He cares for me. He is trustworthy and faithful and where the things of the world can bring only temporary happiness, He brings continual joy and peace.

"I Will Offer Up My Life" was a song that we sang last week in church. I'll share it with you here. The words are so wonderful. Jesus has done so much for us--we should be so thankful and willing to offer our lives back to Him.

Willing to Trust in The Storms of Life

In thinking about the theme of lovelybranchesministries.org "A Willing Heart" this month, I would like to share what the Lord laid on my heart to share with some ladies from my church at a recent breakfast meeting:

We need to have a willing heart to continue to trust God in and during the storms of our lives. As I thought of the word, STORMS, the Lord brought these things to my mind in the form of an acrostic.

S is for SOVEREIGNTY

Just as it was for me 5 years ago when my husband, Ty was diagnosed with cancer and has been for me everyday since, I need to understand and trust that God is sovereign. From Chip Ingram's book, "God As He Longs For Us to See Him", God's sovereignty means that "He is in fact the Lord of all Lords, King of all Kings, and in absolute control of time and eternity. Nothing will come into our lives today that He did not either allow or decree for our ultimate good." Romans 8:28 says: "We know that in ALL things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His Purpose."

T is for TEST

Storms test our faith. We need to have a willing heart to continue to lean on Jesus through those tests. There have been so many times when I have wanted to just give up. I have said so often since Ty's death, "Lord, this is so hard!" It's in those times that Jesus reminds me of His promises and tests my faith by asking if I really BELIEVE everyone of them such as: Joshua 31:8 "The Lord Himself goes before you and will be with you; He will NEVER leave you or forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you HOPE and a future." 2 Corinthians 12:9 But He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." In my weakness, I am so thankful for God's promised strength! A few more wonderful promises: Psalm 37:28 "The Lord loves the just and will not forsake His faithful ones." He also reminds me in many places in His Word that He is my rock, my fortress, my helper, my deliverer, my shelter, my protector, My Savior, my counselor, my friend, and now my husband. How awesome is that?! The key is that we CHOOSE to BELIEVE His unchanging promises and not rely on our ever-changing emotions.

O is for ONLY Jesus Can Bring ONGOING Peace

Again, I have to have a willing heart to choose to believe His promises and to fill my heart and mind with His Word. His Words bring such comfort and peace. Only Jesus can give an ongoing peace that is beyond our understanding. The things and pleasures of our world as well as spending time with friends and family can bring temporary peace, but only an intimate relationship with Jesus can bring a peace that lasts.

R is for REST

God tells us in Matthew 11:28 to "Come to Me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." We need to be willing to REST in Him and rejoice in who He has created us to be. All of us are created uniquely different and the Lord has a specific plan for each of us. The problem comes and our rest disappears when we start comparing ourselves with others and become discontent with who we are or what we have. This journal entry shows how the Lord speaks truth to our hearts and gives us rest as we listen to Him. On this particular day I was struggling with my worth mainly because I was comparing myself with others. As I was studying in the book of Nehemiah, the Lord used the life application helps from some of the passages to encourage me: "Nehemiah and Ezra were very different people, yet God used them both to lead the nation. Remember, there is a place for you in God's work even if you're different from most other people. God uses each person in a unique way to accomplish His purposes." The Lord knew what I needed to hear--He does want to use me here--even though I want to be in heaven and really HOME. He's not ready for me there yet and has a plan for me here. "Nehemiah asked God for specific help. The Lord wants us to pour out our hearts to Him and ask Him for specific things. Just as Nehemiah didn't take matter into his own hands--we shouldn't either. Nehemiah asked God to strengthen him--he relied on God for emotional and mental stability." "Sometimes my mind seems so unfocused and decisions often hard--I need to share my confusion with Jesus and TRUST Him to help me. He's available 24/7 and wants me to REST in Him instead of comparing myself with others and focusing on my weaknesses and failures. I need to remember that the Lord wants me to rejoice in my weaknesses because in my weakness, He is strong. Therefore, as I focus on Him and His strength I can truly REST knowing that I can do all things with His help." I read somewhere recently that we all need to absolutely refuse to compare ourselves with anyone else. We need to REST and rejoice in how God has created us and allow Him to use each of us in unique ways!

M is for MIRACLES or God-Winks as I like to call them

Through the storm of Ty's cancer, his death, and my adjusting to a new life without him, the Lord has demonstrated His intimate love and care for me through many "little miracles" or God-winks. On my most discouraging days, all I have to do is read back through my journals to be reminded of how much Jesus cares for me. Here's a recent example from my journal on December 15, 2011. "As I was heading home from Hutch after dark with many Christmas gifts to unpack from my car, I was feeling especially lonely and thinking how wonderful it would be to come home to having the lights on and Ty greeting me as I came into the garage like he used to and helping me unpack things. Just as I turned onto my street a star shot across the sky in front of me. It was amazing!!! I haven't seen one for a long time, and God always seems to send them exactly when I need a reminder that He is still with me and hasn't forgotten about me. I praised Him for the reminder and unpacked the car with a joyful heart!!"

S is again for SOVEREIGNTY

Being willing to believe and rest in the fact that God is in control is key whether we're heading into the storm, are in the middle of it or heading out of it. Chip Ingram writes: "as we believe that God is both good and sovereign (in control) that we would absolutely refuse to worry knowing that He is working ALL things for our good EVERYDAY even those things we don't understand and seem so unfair."

Summing it up: we have to have a willing heart to trust in and accept God's plan for our lives even in the storms. Our attitude and outlook are so important as we lean on our loving Heavenly Father in and through every storm. Remember, God doesn't always promise to take us out of our storms, but He does promise to walk with us through them.

S--Sovereignty--God knows what's BEST ALWAYS.

T--Test--Storms test our faith, but we can trust Jesus to walk with us through them.

O--Only Jesus can bring Ongoing peace

R--Test in Jesus and rejoice in who you are in Him

M--Miracles (God-winks) that remind us of His love and faithfulness

S--Sovereignty--God is in control. We don't need to worry.

I know that I've shared the following song before as it was our family theme song through the cancer journey with Ty, but it is a perfect one to listen to when you're faced with a storm in your life. It's called "Praise You In This Storm"by Casting Crowns. What hope we have in Jesus. We need to be willing to share our hearts and hurts with Him and allow Him to comfort and carry us! As the song says, "He holds every tear in His hands and never leaves our side." I pray that He will bless each of you today with more of His amazing love as you reach out to Him with a willing heart and trust Him.

Focus: Humility in Jesus

Happy New Year! During this Christmas season the Lord has led me to many articles and passages from His Word which have been focused on humility. In today's world the focus is not usually on our being humble but on getting our wants met and thinking more of ourselves than others. And yet, as a follower of Jesus Christ, my desire should be to be more like Him--a humble servant.

According to Philippians 2:5-8

"Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus; who being in the very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made Himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance of a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to death--even death on a cross!"

Also, we are instructed in Philippians 2:3-4 to

"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of us should look not only to our own interests but to the interests of others."

On a personal note; as I look back over much of my life, that has definitely not been my focus. I wanted my way more than I wanted God's way and put my interests before others. Therefore, I took many wonderful people for granted and didn't really appreciate all the blessings I already had--focusing more on what I didn't have. As the Lord has reminded me during this Christmas season of how much He has changed my heart as I have surrendered my agenda and all that I am and have to Him, I want to challenge you to do the same and to truly rest in His all-encompassing love for you. Our world would be a better place if we would all bow in humble submission to our loving and faithful Heavenly Father.

Becoming humble isn't easy. Dr. Juli Slattery in her book "Beyond the Masquerade" tells us how we can become a humble person:

"Humility isn't something we can attain, but it is something we can both choose and seek. Making the choice to humble yourself is never easy. Humility will feel painful and unnatural because it's inevitably linked with the death of yourself. When Jesus called His disciples to die to self, He wasn't joking. Even in small ways, choosing the path of humility will be marked by feelings of dread or desperation. It may mean not demanding your way even though it's your right to do so. It means choosing to see others with the same value that you give yourself, remembering that but for the grace of God you would be the vilest of sinners. Sometimes choosing humility is as simple and difficult as saying "I'm sorry" or refusing to becomes defensive in an argument. Although we can't make ourselves humble, we can desire humility and ask the Lord to cut away at our prideful hearts."

What a challenge!! The key is that we desire humility and that we understand that we can't "make ourselves" humble. I was encouraged as I read these words from the book, "Radical" by David Platt. "God delights in using ordinary Christians who come to the end of themselves and choose to trust in His extraordinary provision. He stands ready to allocate His Power to all who are radically devoted to making much of Him." How encouraging is that?! As we seek humility, we receive His power (the same power that raised Jesus from the dead) to live for Him. I agree with Andrew Murray who said: "It is indeed the deepest happiness to be so free from self that whatever is said of us or done to us is swallowed up in the thought that Jesus is all and we are nothing." Then, to further encourage you to give all of yourself to Jesus are these words from the book "Jesus Calling" by Sarah Young written as if Jesus were talking directly to you. "I am leading you along a path that is uniquely right for you. The closer to Me you grow, the more fully you become your true self--the one I designed you to be. The more completely you devote yourself to Me, the more freely you can love other people. Marvel at the beauty of a life intertwined with My Presence. Rejoice as we journey together in intimate communion. Enjoy the adventure of finding yourself through losing yourself to Me."

That is my prayer for each of us--that we would lose ourselves (surrender all that we are and all that we have) to Jesus and experience an intimate relationship with the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. NOTHING is better than that!!! Also, in our very uncertain economy, I want to remind you not to fear the future because our all-powerful, all-knowing Savior holds the future in His hands. He promises in Joshua 1:5 "No one will be able to stand up against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses so I will be with you; I will never leave you or forsake you." Rest in His arms of love today and all year long!!

Enjoy the following fun song by Steven Curtis Chapman and remember to glorify God with everything you do.

Heaven's Cake

Christmas is almost here...again. The years continue to fly by faster and faster. It's such a busy time and can easily become stressful as the focus can end up being too much on gifts and decorating rather than on Jesus. We need to remember that Christmas is Jesus' birthday and our focus should be on Him and celebrating all that He has done for us. Following is an article called "Heaven's Cake" by Vic Black of the Navigators which tells about the greatest gift any of us could ever receive--Jesus.

"If Jesus were the only gift God ever gave, would you be thankful? Mother Teresa said once, "Jesus is not all you need until He is all you have." She also said, "Perhaps God's judgment on America today is the plague of muchness." If we have so much, we tend not to be thankful for Jesus. And if we are not thankful for Jesus we tend not to be thankful for everything else. Because if we are truly thankful for Jesus, if we are genuinely gripped by all that He accomplished for us, then everything else is just icing on the cake. The cake is Jesus!"

Now go back and read that again. Is Jesus enough in your life? Are you truly thankful for Him? Is He your focus? As I've shared before, Jesus sure wasn't my focus for many years. I spent much more time shopping and trying to get what the world says will bring happiness instead of reading God's precious love letter to me--the Bible and getting to know Him better. It's so easy to become consumed by the "stuff" instead of the Savior. I have lived both ways and can promise you that when Jesus is your focus and growing closer to Him is your top priority then you will appreciate everything and everyone more. You will be content with so much less. More of Jesus brings contentment not more things! I challenge you this month to make Jesus your all-consuming passion and follow His example that He left for us in Philippians 2:5-11.

"Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:

Who, being in very nature God,

did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,

but made Himself nothing,

taking the very nature of a servant,

being made in human likeness.

And being found in appearance as a man,

He humbled Himself

and became obedient to death--

even death of a cross!

Therefore God exalted Him to the highest place

and gave Him the name that is above every name,

that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,

in heaven and on earth and under the earth,

and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord,

to the glory of God the Father."

The life application commentary says: "Jesus Christ was humble, willing to give up His rights in order to obey God and serve people. Like Christ, we should have a servant's attitude, serving out of love for God and for others not out of guilt or fear. Remember, you can choose your attitude. You can approach life expecting to be served, or you can look for opportunities to serve others."

In the hustle and bustle of the Christmas season focus on being a humble servant like Jesus. Remember to celebrate His birth and to be thankful for His amazing love and willingness to die for You. Don't get so busy that you don't appreciate all the little blessings He gives you each day--enjoy all those special moments with family and friends. Share a yummy cup of coffee or hot chocolate with whipped cream (I call it happy cream) with a special friend. Find joy in the simplest of things. Appreciate what you already have instead of always wanting more. Give lots of hugs, compliment often and smile alot! This paragraph from the devotional, "Jesus Calling" sums this up so well. Listen to Jesus' words to you:

"As you go through this day, look for tiny treasures strategically placed
along the way. I lovingly go before you and plant little pleasures to brighten
your day. Look carefully for them, and pluck them one by one. When you reach the
end of the day, you will have gathered a lovely bouquet. Offer it up to Me with
a grateful heart. Receive My Peace as you lie down to sleep, with thankful
thoughts playing a lullaby in your mind."

I'm praying that His peace and joy will overwhelm you this Christmas season as you focus on heaven's cake and God's best gift to you--JESUS!

The following song: To Know You by Casting Crowns speaks so well of what I have shared with you--that more of Jesus is the answer not more things. As the song says, "I live my life to know you more and to know you is to want to know you more." Truly, nothing compares to knowing Jesus. Reach out to Him. Read His Word. He promises that if you seek Him you will find Him and therefore find peace, joy and contentment--the best gifts ever!!!

Thank you, Jesus

What a beautiful time of year! I just love fall and the fresh, cool air and beautiful trees as the leaves change colors. The sunrises and sunsets have been so gorgeous lately too. I had some special ladies over yesterday for lunch, and served that great fall dessert--apple crisp with ice cream. Yum! Our God gives us so many special gifts.

I'm so thankful for the Lord's faithfulness and loving care. He continues to be my closest friend and provides for all of my needs. I'm also thankful for the blessing of many special friends. As I was thinking about friendships, the Lord brought Ruth and Naomi to my mind. Naomi's husband as well as her sons had died. She encouraged her daughter-in-law, Ruth to go back to her people and her gods. Ruth 1:16-17 "But Ruth replied, Don't urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried. May the Lord deal with me, be it ever so severely, if anything but death separates you and me." That's what I would call true friendship. The summary of their relationship given in my Bible was so good at reminding me that with God at the center in any relationship it will flourish even when the people involved are very different. From the summary: "We know more about Ruth and Naomi's relationship than about them as individuals. In an age that worships individualism, their stories become models of good relationships. Naomi and Ruth are beautiful examples of this blending of lives. Their cultures, family backgrounds, and ages were very different. As mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, they probably had as many opportunities for tension as for tenderness. And yet they were bound to each other. They shared deep sorrow, great affection for each other, and an overriding commitment to the God of Israel." The key to their closeness is a reminder to all of us: "God was at the center of their intimate communication. Ruth came to know the God of Israel through Naomi. The older woman allowed Ruth to see, hear and feel all the joy and anguish of her relationship to God. How often do you feel that your thoughts and questions about God should be left out of a close relationship? How often do you share your unedited thoughts about God with your spouse and friends? Sharing openly about our relationship with God can bring depth and intimacy to our relationships with others." The lesson we can learn from their lives is that "God's living presence in a relationship overcomes differences that might otherwise create division and disharmony."

I have certainly found that in my relationships with friends and family. Just a side note to you ladies who still have your husbands. I would encourage you to talk about Jesus together, to read His Word and pray together. He will bless your relationship in more ways than you can imagine as you make Him the center of it!! Ty and I didn't do that nearly enough because we let other things take priority. Oh what I would give now to have those opportunities back--nothing else we were doing was more important than spending time with Jesus together! It's such a joy and encouragement to get together with friends and family and talk about what Jesus is doing in our lives and what He is teaching us. As I've shared often here, life is so empty and meaningless when your focus is on things, money, and worldly success (which was my focus for so many years). There is nothing wrong with those things as long as they don't become your focus over an intimate relationship with Jesus. Only He can bring you contentment, peace and joy. Then when He blesses you with friendships like Ruth and Naomi's where Jesus is at the center it's like that yummy cup of coffee with lots of whipped cream on top!

Our best friend, of course, should be our Lord and Savior. The day He reminded me about Ruth and Naomi, He also led me to Psalm 25:14. "The Lord confides in those who fear Him; He makes His covenant known to them." To fear the Lord is to have reverence for Him. My life application Bible says that "It's also to recognize Him for who He is: holy, almighty, righteous, pure, all-knowing, all-powerful and all-wise. God offers intimate and lasting friendship to those who revere Him, who hold Him in highest honor. What relationship could ever compare with having the Lord of all creation for a friend? Your everlasting friendship with God will grow as you respect and honor Him." Take it from me, the one who for so long didn't make my relationship with Jesus my #1 priority, having Him there now as my Savior, Father, husband, best friend and counselor affects every other aspect of my life for the better helping me to appreciate even more my relationships with family and friends as well as all the little and big blessings He gives me each day. I agree with Paul when he says in Philippians 4:11 "...I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances." Choosing to put Him first every day is the key to that contentment and nothing is better than that.

My heart overflows with thankfulness for all of my precious family and friends. I'm trusting that Jesus will remind each of you this month of His faithfulness and overwhelming love for you. I just love Him so much!!!

I've chosen "All of Creation" by Mercy Me to share with you today. As the song says, I challenge you to lay your burden down today. Let Jesus carry you, and praise Him for all His many blessings.

On a silly note: the kid in me loved the elephant toward the end of the video. Hopefully it will make you smile!

Discovering God by Resting in Him

This month I'm going to take you on a journey from a time of despair to a time of triumph. This journey has happened many times in my life in the past, but the one I'll share with you happened in the last 24 hours.

Yesterday morning was the time I had decided to write the words of hope to share with you here. The problem was that I hadn't been feeling very hopeful lately. I was battling with extreme loneliness for Ty and was really struggling with my worth, my purpose and a reason to be here. Honestly and selfishly, I just wanted to be home in heaven with Jesus and Ty. In other words, I was very discouraged and feeling sorry for myself. Even amidst the discouraging times, I do know that one of the reasons I'm still here is to share my heart with others. In hearing that I don't have it all together and sometimes feel alone and like God is not listening, I hope that others will be encouraged knowing that we all struggle, but that we have a Savior who brings hope!

So... in this frame of mind, I ask the Lord to help me to know what He wanted me to share. As I read in His Word and through my journals, I seemed to only become more anxious and confused. Nothing seemed to be coming together. I thought, "Lord, you know I can't write without your help. I'm not getting any clear direction from You. Are you sure I'm still supposed to be doing this?" Then Satan started or maybe I should say he continued (remember, he was already getting me to question my worth and purpose) his attacks of "Why do you even try? You know you're not good at this. You're not a writer--everyone else does a better job. This always takes you out of your comfort zone--why not avoid that and just quit?"

Satan knows each of us so well and knows exactly how to bring us down. He knows that if he can get us discouraged that we will not be effective in sharing the hope of Jesus because we won't be hopeful ourselves. Well, that's where I was. I knew I needed to call a friend to pray for me but almost didn't do that because Satan had me feeling like no one would care; that I should just get a grip and wasn't I always the one who told everyone to just trust and believe God's promises? I finally told Satan to shut up and pushed send so the call would go through. Friends are so wonderful. My friend spoke truth to my despairing heart and Satan's lies crumbled! She suggested that I just set the blog aside and do something else like maybe take a walk. So that's what I did after she prayed for me.

As my dog Shea and I walked, I chose to talk to Jesus even though I didn't really feel like it. As I walked and talked with Jesus, He revealed something to me. Many times it's easier for me to believe my feelings than to believe the truth and promises in His Word. My feelings (or thoughts) seem to shout so much louder. Is that true for you too? Again, Satan's greatest tool is discouragement, and he usually does that through lies and attacks on our character. Satan is also so good at bringing up past mistakes and failures as well as trying to get me to focus on my feelings of loneliness for Ty so that I feel sorry for myself instead of rejoicing in the many blessings I still have.

Anyway, the walk was very helpful and Jesus also brought to mind a song that will be perfect to share with you too. He also revealed to me that when I tried to write the blog earlier that I hadn't really been resting in Him. I was more concerned with getting it written according to "my schedule" not His. His plan was for me to wait on Him for His timing which didn't come until this morning. In the meantime, He gave me the words of hope that He wanted me to share as I chose to rest in Him and quit striving on my own!

Those first words of hope came last night before I went to bed. He led me to Psalm 27:13,14.

"I am still confident of this; I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord."

Resting involves waiting many times and as the life application commentary from my Bible says: "Waiting for God is not easy. Often it seems that He isn't answering our prayers or doesn't understand the urgency of our situation. That kind of thinking implies that God is not in control or is not fair. But God is worth waiting for.

Lamentations 3:24-26 calls us to hope in and wait for the Lord because often God uses waiting to refresh, renew, and teach us. Make good use of your resting/waiting times by discovering what God may be trying to teach you in them. I ask the Lord to continue to teach me in this time of resting and waiting.

Then this morning I chose to rest in Him, even though I still didn't feel very hopeful, and ask Him to teach me from His Word. He led me first to Psalm 88 verses 1 and 2.

"O Lord, the God who saves me, day and night I cry out before you. May my prayer come before you, turn your ear to my cry."

I mentioned earlier about being lonely for Ty. It will be two years since he went home to heaven on October 17. I battle with those thoughts that say I shouldn't battle the grief and loneliness anymore; that I should rejoice for the 28 years of marriage that we had instead of mourning the years that I wish we could have had. Again, Jesus knew He needed to remind me and others that it's okay to express our hearts, hurts and despair to Him. He understands and sees every tear. The life application commentary says:

"Grief and depression take time to heal. No matter how low we feel, we can always take our problems to God and express our anguish to Him."

Won't heaven be wonderful when there will no longer be grief and discouragement?

God continued to remind me of the importance of continuing to run to Him even when we don't feel like it. Psalm 86:7 says:

"In the day of my trouble I will call to you, for you will answer me."

That's what He was doing now as I went to His Word--reminding me of His faithfulness. Then to Psalm 86:17

"Give me a sign of your goodness, that my enemies may see it and be put to shame, for you, O Lord, have helped me and comforted me."

Again, the commentary: "It is right to pray for a sign of God's goodness. As David found, it may be just what we need. But let us not overlook the signs he has already given: the support of family and friends, the fellowship of other Christians, the light of each new day. And we can be confident that He knows our situation no matter how desperate it becomes, and He cares."

He had shown me His goodness through the help of my friend as well as His care by taking me back to the hope in His Word. He always knows exactly what we need!

I know this is getting long -- you may need to take a break and get a yummy cup of coffee before you read the rest! Jesus had one more passage to encourage us to put to death Satan's lie that God can't use us because of the failures and mistakes of our past. I Timothy 1:12-14 says:

"I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that He considered me faithful, appointing me to His service. Even though I was once a blasphemer and persecutor and a violent man, I was shown mercy because I acted in ignorance and unbelief. The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly, along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus."

From the life application commentary: "People can feel so guilt-riden by their past that they think God could never forgive and accept them. But consider Paul's past. He had scoffed at the teachings of Jesus and had hunted down and murdered God's people before coming to faith in Christ. God forgave Paul and used Paul mightily for His kingdom. No matter how shameful your past, God also can forgive and use you. We will experience times of failure. But we can remain confident that Christ will help our faith and love grow as our relationship with Him deepens. Paul's prayer for the Philippians applies to us also: 'He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus'." (Philippians 1:6)

So there you have it. Like Paul, I have made many mistakes in my past and much of my focus was on myself and pursuing the things of the world rather than on Jesus. Even though I knew Jesus, I tried to find peace and hope in things and other people more than in Him alone. Only He can satisfy our lonely hearts and meet our every need. It would be wonderful if we could live every minute triumphant in Him, but we can't. Until heaven, we will have times of discouragement and despair when our feelings seem to shout so much louder than God's promises to us, but we can choose to persevere, to run to His Word, read and rest in His promises and bask in His never-ending love for us.

Worship and Praise Him as you listen to the song: "Your Grace Still Amazes Me." I pray that you will find rest and peace in His amazing love for you.

Due to the death of Keva's father this past week she may not be posting for September.

Please check back at a later date and keep Keva, her mom Donna and the rest of the family in your prayers.