Honestly, my heart is breaking right now. I don't feel like writing this blog or doing anything else for that matter. And yet... the title of my blog is "Hope in Jesus". Can I still have hope in Jesus when I am hurting and would just like to snap my fingers and be in heaven with Jesus and Ty? Even though I don't "feel" hopeful, I can choose to go back to His Word and be reminded of His faithfulness in Psalm 33:4:
"For the word of the Lord is right and true; He is faithful in all He does."
I can also choose to go back to my journals and read of His faithfulness time after time. I just want to be very transparent with you and let you see that life is hard and many, many times I have to cry out to my Heavenly Father and express my feelings of hurt, loneliness and despair and ask Him to give me hope again. Interestingly enough, that is where I was at most of this past week-end.
Last month I shared a verse the Lord gave me from I Thessalonians 5:16-18.
"Rejoice always, pray continually and give thanks in all circumstances for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."
Well...yesterday morning when I woke up I was feeling quite overwhelmed as I thought about facing another day and the upcoming winter months without Ty. I just wanted to pull the covers over my head and make life go away. I was again thankful that Ty and Yance got my dog, Shea, for me. I have to get up to take care of her and that includes taking her for a walk. That morning as we walked, I remembered the verse again and thanked God for the beautiful fall morning and for my family and many friends. I again was very honest in sharing my thoughts and feelings with Him. I asked Him to show me His glory and told Him that I could sure use a "God-wink" (special blessing from Him). Many times in the past, especially when Ty had cancer, He would send me a shooting star, but this particular morning the stars weren't very visible because of the full moon. I continued to walk and talk to Him, but I just didn't feel His closeness. Then, He directed me to look up and a star shot across the sky! It was so amazing. You need to understand that it has been a long time since He has blessed me with a God-wink in the form of a shooting star. He knows our hearts though, and knows when we desperately need a reminder that He hasn't forgotten about us. I praised Him again for His faithfulness as I headed back home and was even more amazed when I turned on the radio and heard the song, Wish You Were Here by Mark Harris. It made me cry as I could imagine Ty singing the words about holding onto Jesus until He takes me home. I thought, okay, I can do that. Life is so short, and I will soon be in heaven too. Again, the Lord knew what I needed and encouraged me with that song. I hope it will encourage you too as I have posted it at the bottom of this page.
You would think that after the blessings He gave me yesterday that I would be having a better day today. That's not how life works though. Each month that I write this blog, Satan tries to put me down and get me very discouraged. He doesn't want me to share about the hope I have in Jesus. That hope is there no matter how I feel. I am thankful for my friends and family who have walked this road with me since Ty's death in October of 2009. The prayers, cards, encouraging words and love have been a tremendous blessing. I especially enjoyed a very special time with my family last week-end (the first anniversary of Ty's going to his forever home with Jesus). We spent Saturday at the Wichita Zoo which was especially fun with my grandson, Preston. We all missed Ty but were glad we could be together and rejoice in our Lord's faithfulness to us this past year.
That faithfulness is what He reminded me of this morning as I read from the book, God As He Longs For You to See Him by Chip Ingram. As Chip says, "God wants us to pour out our hearts to Him to bring our problems, pain and failures to Him. That's what Jeremiah did and he found that no matter how dark or bad his circumstances, they did not match God's faithfulness."
Jeremiah wrote in Lamentations 3:21-24 "Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself,
The Lord is my portion; therefore, I will wait for Him."
Chip says: "We taste God's faithfulness when we begin to trust Him with our tomorrows and then watch to see what He does. Jeremiah learned to greet each day with an assurance that the Lord was his "portion"-- that God is the one solid, unmovable, reliable part of any day. No one delivers like He does. We must learn to place our hope in Christ--not in stuff, not in good health, not in the future, not in the stock market, not in the ups and downs of dating life or marriage. Every other basis for hope will let us down. Only in Christ do we find the secret to a life of unending joy and peace, because He is the only one who will come through for us 100 percent of the time in any and every situation forever."
A. W. Tozer writes: "Upon God's faithfulness rests our whole hope of future blessedness...only as we have complete assurance that He is faithful may we live in peace and look forward with assurance to the life to come."
I am thankful for God's faithfulness. I chose to share my heart with you here not because I felt like it at all but because I knew God wanted me to. He gave me the words and the songs to share. I hope that you are encouraged and you too will run to Him even when you don't feel like it because He is faithful and will never leave you or forsake you. I'll leave you with the song, My Redeemer is Faithful and True by Steven Curtis Chapman as well as the Mark Harris song I mentioned above.
Monday, October 25, 2010
Friday, October 1, 2010
Changing Seasons with An Unchanging God
The changing seasons are one of the things I have always loved about living in Kansas. I always look forward to each one, but fall is definitely my favorite. I have now experienced going through three of the seasons without Ty.
Last year as the fall season began, Ty was still here but shortly after that time, on October 17, he went to his forever home with Jesus. It's hard to believe that it has been almost a year--a year of walking with Jesus one day at a time--many times one minute at a time. It has been a very hard year but also an encouraging year as my Savior and Best Friend has always been there for me and has provided a refuge, security and peace that is so beyond my understanding. He has been faithful as I've continued to reach out to Him regardless of my feelings. My faith has grown stronger as I've experienced Him carrying me through this time and carrying my sons and their families too. Honestly, I feel very weak most of the time, but God's Word promises that when I am weak, He will give me strength. (II Corinthians 12:9.10). How awesome that in my weakness, Jesus is strong and He is glorified more and more as I choose to move forward in His strength.
Oswald Chambers says:
Faith must be tested because it can only become our intimate possession through conflict. The ultimate thing is confidence in Jesus. Believe steadfastly on Him and everything that challenges you will strengthen your faith. Faith is absolute TRUST in God--trust that will never imagine that He would forsake us. (Hebrews 13:5-6).
I continue to ask God what His will is for me. As hard as it is to be here without Ty, I know that He still has a plan for me. Recently, He lead me to these verses in I Thessalonians 5:16-18.
"Rejoice always, pray continuously, and give thanks in all circumstances for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."
Those verses are quite clear in telling me what I need to be doing. It's definitely not easy, but I want to CHOOSE every day to be joyful, pray (talk to Jesus) continually, and give thanks in ALL circumstances. As always, when I am obedient to what Jesus asks me to do, He is faithful to give me more peace, joy and contentment than I can imagine. In the devotional book, "Jesus Calling" I was encouraged as I read this morning,
"Relax in my everlasting arms. Your weakness is an opportunity to grow strong in awareness of My Almighty Presence. Look to Me and My sufficiency; rejoice in my radiant riches that are abundantly available to help you. Go gently through this day, leaning on me and enjoying My presence. Thank Me for your neediness, which is building trust-bonds between us. If you look back on your journey thus far, you can see that days of extreme weakness have been some of your most precious times. Memories of these days are richly interwoven with golden strands of My intimate presence."
How true that has been for me. In my weakest times, Jesus has revealed Himself more clearly. Believe me, the strength, joy and peace that you see in me come from Jesus. If it weren't for Him, I would have given into the grief and loneliness that overwhelmed me so often this past year since Ty died. When I am tempted to focus on all the years on this earth that I'm missing with Ty, I am reminded of God's eternal plan and encouraged by Connie Mitchell, a widow whose husband also died after they had been married only 28 years (the same as Ty and I). She said,
"God is clearing away my short-sightedness and helping me comprehend that He has a much bigger eternal plan than I can even imagine. He knows the end of the story and someday we will see the whole picture. In the meantime I am content to trust in His goodness and love for my family and for me."
God is good and I am thankful that He never changes. As the seasons continue to change, I'm going to choose to take His hand, to rest and rely on Him and to continue to trust Him one day at a time. I pray that each of you will do the same because I can promise you that as you do, He will be faithful!
Enjoy the beautiful pictures on the video as well as the words of the song, "Be Still and Know" by Steven Curtis Chapman. When I chose this song to share I was so excited when it mentioned God's faithfulness and that He never changes. He's amazing--He even provided the perfect song to finish my blog with!
Last year as the fall season began, Ty was still here but shortly after that time, on October 17, he went to his forever home with Jesus. It's hard to believe that it has been almost a year--a year of walking with Jesus one day at a time--many times one minute at a time. It has been a very hard year but also an encouraging year as my Savior and Best Friend has always been there for me and has provided a refuge, security and peace that is so beyond my understanding. He has been faithful as I've continued to reach out to Him regardless of my feelings. My faith has grown stronger as I've experienced Him carrying me through this time and carrying my sons and their families too. Honestly, I feel very weak most of the time, but God's Word promises that when I am weak, He will give me strength. (II Corinthians 12:9.10). How awesome that in my weakness, Jesus is strong and He is glorified more and more as I choose to move forward in His strength.
Oswald Chambers says:
Faith must be tested because it can only become our intimate possession through conflict. The ultimate thing is confidence in Jesus. Believe steadfastly on Him and everything that challenges you will strengthen your faith. Faith is absolute TRUST in God--trust that will never imagine that He would forsake us. (Hebrews 13:5-6).
I continue to ask God what His will is for me. As hard as it is to be here without Ty, I know that He still has a plan for me. Recently, He lead me to these verses in I Thessalonians 5:16-18.
"Rejoice always, pray continuously, and give thanks in all circumstances for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."
Those verses are quite clear in telling me what I need to be doing. It's definitely not easy, but I want to CHOOSE every day to be joyful, pray (talk to Jesus) continually, and give thanks in ALL circumstances. As always, when I am obedient to what Jesus asks me to do, He is faithful to give me more peace, joy and contentment than I can imagine. In the devotional book, "Jesus Calling" I was encouraged as I read this morning,
"Relax in my everlasting arms. Your weakness is an opportunity to grow strong in awareness of My Almighty Presence. Look to Me and My sufficiency; rejoice in my radiant riches that are abundantly available to help you. Go gently through this day, leaning on me and enjoying My presence. Thank Me for your neediness, which is building trust-bonds between us. If you look back on your journey thus far, you can see that days of extreme weakness have been some of your most precious times. Memories of these days are richly interwoven with golden strands of My intimate presence."
How true that has been for me. In my weakest times, Jesus has revealed Himself more clearly. Believe me, the strength, joy and peace that you see in me come from Jesus. If it weren't for Him, I would have given into the grief and loneliness that overwhelmed me so often this past year since Ty died. When I am tempted to focus on all the years on this earth that I'm missing with Ty, I am reminded of God's eternal plan and encouraged by Connie Mitchell, a widow whose husband also died after they had been married only 28 years (the same as Ty and I). She said,
"God is clearing away my short-sightedness and helping me comprehend that He has a much bigger eternal plan than I can even imagine. He knows the end of the story and someday we will see the whole picture. In the meantime I am content to trust in His goodness and love for my family and for me."
God is good and I am thankful that He never changes. As the seasons continue to change, I'm going to choose to take His hand, to rest and rely on Him and to continue to trust Him one day at a time. I pray that each of you will do the same because I can promise you that as you do, He will be faithful!
Enjoy the beautiful pictures on the video as well as the words of the song, "Be Still and Know" by Steven Curtis Chapman. When I chose this song to share I was so excited when it mentioned God's faithfulness and that He never changes. He's amazing--He even provided the perfect song to finish my blog with!
Monday, August 23, 2010
Jesus' Continued Faithfulness
As fall approaches and school begins again, I asked the Lord this morning, "What have you been teaching me?"
Honestly, this month has been a very emotional one for me. My youngest son, Yance married his sweetheart, Elaine on August 14. The week-end was filled with much fun and excitement as we traveled to Oklahoma City and enjoyed spending time with family and friends. A special memory for me was having Yance stay in my room the night before the wedding. We talked, cried and prayed together until early in the morning. We missed Ty so much and yet the Lord gave us both a peace as we thought of him in heaven with Jesus.
The wedding was beautiful as Yance and Elaine gave glory to our Lord and Savior and were so excited to finally be married. As the wedding began I was so honored to be escorted to my seat by my two sons and was thankful for my Lord's strength as my heart ached for Ty. It was another step on the journey that the Lord has me on. I enjoyed every minute of the wedding and am so blessed to have two sons who are following their Dad's advice to love the Lord their God with all their heart, soul and mind. Not only that but I now have two very special daughters who love our sons and love Jesus too. Of course, I can't forget my grandson, Preston. I have so much to be thankful for.
However, at home after the wedding my emotions had changed. I didn't feel so thankful. I really didn't feel much at all other than I longed to be in heaven with Jesus and Ty. I cried out to Jesus even though I really didn't feel like it. He led me to read back through my journal from last November. I wasn't surprised that as I began reading from my journal and His Word that God continued to remind me of the hope I have in Him and all that I have to look forward to in my forever home in heaven.
Here are some highlights from that journal entry on November 15, 2009 (about a month after Ty died). Alot of my thoughts on that day were the same thoughts I had the week after the wedding. My prayer is that the things the Lord spoke to me will be an encouragement to you in whatever you're going through.
Date: November 15, 2009
"Jesus, thanks so much for loving me. Yesterday turned out to be a very difficult day. I missed Ty more than ever and the thought of getting up everyday for the rest of my life without him was overwhelming. Thanks for reminding me that you only ask me to take one day at a time and that you will give me strength for each day. I didn't feel your presence yesterday and yet as I was obedient to you and chose to read from your Word and hear your Word preached by Chip Ingram (www.lote.org) you reminded me of your promises:
Later in the week He led me to Psalm 39. The theme of this Psalm is 'apart from God, life is fleeting and empty'. Verse 4 says:
"Show me, O Lord, my life's end and the number of my days, let me know how fleeting is my life. You have made my days a mere handbreadth; the span of my years is as nothing before you. Each man's life is but a breath. Man is a mere phantom as he goes to and fro; he bustles about but only in vain; he heaps up wealth, not knowing who will get it. But now, Lord, what do I look for? My hope is in you."
The commentary in my Bible says: "The brevity of life is a theme throughout the books of Psalms, Proverbs, and Ecclesiastes. Ironically people spend so much time securing their lives on earth and spend little or no thought about where they will spend eternity. David realized that amassing riches and busily accomplishing worldly tasks would make no difference in eternity. Few people understand that their only hope is in the Lord." Amen to that--nothing the world offers could give me the peace and strength that Jesus gives me each day as I depend on Him.
As I have read and studied and chosen to fill my mind with the truths of God's Word since coming home from Yance and Elaine's wedding, my Savior and Lord continues to teach me about the hope I have in Him. He wants me to continue to remind others of that hope and how much Jesus loves each one of us. The other thing He has been reminding me is that this world is not my home. It's okay to be homesick for my forever home in heaven, but He isn't finished with me here yet and wants me to choose each day to rejoice in Him and rely on Him minute by minute for strength to do whatever He asks me to do.
The following videos really encouraged me this week. They both are about heaven which seems to be on my mind alot these days. Actually, I know that we would all be happier and more content if we would focus on Jesus and our eternal home more than the things of the world. Remember, this world is not our home, we're just passing through. We have so much to look forward to in heaven with our Savior and Lord.
Honestly, this month has been a very emotional one for me. My youngest son, Yance married his sweetheart, Elaine on August 14. The week-end was filled with much fun and excitement as we traveled to Oklahoma City and enjoyed spending time with family and friends. A special memory for me was having Yance stay in my room the night before the wedding. We talked, cried and prayed together until early in the morning. We missed Ty so much and yet the Lord gave us both a peace as we thought of him in heaven with Jesus.
The wedding was beautiful as Yance and Elaine gave glory to our Lord and Savior and were so excited to finally be married. As the wedding began I was so honored to be escorted to my seat by my two sons and was thankful for my Lord's strength as my heart ached for Ty. It was another step on the journey that the Lord has me on. I enjoyed every minute of the wedding and am so blessed to have two sons who are following their Dad's advice to love the Lord their God with all their heart, soul and mind. Not only that but I now have two very special daughters who love our sons and love Jesus too. Of course, I can't forget my grandson, Preston. I have so much to be thankful for.
However, at home after the wedding my emotions had changed. I didn't feel so thankful. I really didn't feel much at all other than I longed to be in heaven with Jesus and Ty. I cried out to Jesus even though I really didn't feel like it. He led me to read back through my journal from last November. I wasn't surprised that as I began reading from my journal and His Word that God continued to remind me of the hope I have in Him and all that I have to look forward to in my forever home in heaven.
Here are some highlights from that journal entry on November 15, 2009 (about a month after Ty died). Alot of my thoughts on that day were the same thoughts I had the week after the wedding. My prayer is that the things the Lord spoke to me will be an encouragement to you in whatever you're going through.
Date: November 15, 2009
"Jesus, thanks so much for loving me. Yesterday turned out to be a very difficult day. I missed Ty more than ever and the thought of getting up everyday for the rest of my life without him was overwhelming. Thanks for reminding me that you only ask me to take one day at a time and that you will give me strength for each day. I didn't feel your presence yesterday and yet as I was obedient to you and chose to read from your Word and hear your Word preached by Chip Ingram (www.lote.org) you reminded me of your promises:
that you haven't forgotten about me,
that you love me and
that I can count on you to walk with me side by side each new day for the rest of my life.
I choose to believe you when you say that you have plans for me, plans to prosper and not to harm me, plans to give me hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11); that you will work all things together for good for those who love you (Romans 8:28).
The best part of the day was when you showed yourself so abundantly as I was going to bed. Father, I was so lonesome then and as Chip had mentioned earlier, I should just cry out to you. That's what I did. I asked you to speak to me and you led me to the Voice of the Martyrs book- Extreme Devotion. The tears started as I remembered reading in it so many times on our way to the clinic when Ty had cancer. As I opened it to the place we had last read together, I read the verses that you had reminded me of already twice that day--from a friend and also on the radio: Romans 5:3-5 "Not only so but we also rejoice in our sufferings because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us because God has poured out His love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit whom He has given us." Ty and I went to that passage often during the cancer journey for encouragement and hope. It was like both you and Ty wanted to remind me to rejoice and hope in you. Ty and I often talked about the privilege it was to share in your sufferings, Lord, in order to bring more glory to you. It was and still isn't easy at all, but I'm so thankful for all you've taught me and continue to teach me about your love and faithfulness."
Later in the week He led me to Psalm 39. The theme of this Psalm is 'apart from God, life is fleeting and empty'. Verse 4 says:
"Show me, O Lord, my life's end and the number of my days, let me know how fleeting is my life. You have made my days a mere handbreadth; the span of my years is as nothing before you. Each man's life is but a breath. Man is a mere phantom as he goes to and fro; he bustles about but only in vain; he heaps up wealth, not knowing who will get it. But now, Lord, what do I look for? My hope is in you."
The commentary in my Bible says: "The brevity of life is a theme throughout the books of Psalms, Proverbs, and Ecclesiastes. Ironically people spend so much time securing their lives on earth and spend little or no thought about where they will spend eternity. David realized that amassing riches and busily accomplishing worldly tasks would make no difference in eternity. Few people understand that their only hope is in the Lord." Amen to that--nothing the world offers could give me the peace and strength that Jesus gives me each day as I depend on Him.
As I have read and studied and chosen to fill my mind with the truths of God's Word since coming home from Yance and Elaine's wedding, my Savior and Lord continues to teach me about the hope I have in Him. He wants me to continue to remind others of that hope and how much Jesus loves each one of us. The other thing He has been reminding me is that this world is not my home. It's okay to be homesick for my forever home in heaven, but He isn't finished with me here yet and wants me to choose each day to rejoice in Him and rely on Him minute by minute for strength to do whatever He asks me to do.
The following videos really encouraged me this week. They both are about heaven which seems to be on my mind alot these days. Actually, I know that we would all be happier and more content if we would focus on Jesus and our eternal home more than the things of the world. Remember, this world is not our home, we're just passing through. We have so much to look forward to in heaven with our Savior and Lord.
Sunday, August 1, 2010
The Blessing of Abiding in Jesus
Abiding in Christ means trusting Him, reaching out to Him, choosing to run to Him and find peace and rest when life is so hard. As I pondered what the Lord would want me to share this month, He immediately brought to my mind a very hard evening on my recent vacation to Horn Creek, a family camp in Colorado. Ty and I and our boys have gone there every year (except for one) since 1986 when Wyatt(our oldest) was just 13 months old. I debated about going this year without Ty, but the Lord assured me that I wouldn't be alone--He would be with me. Wyatt, Laurel and Preston went too, as well as my mom. But--back to that evening that I mentioned earlier. I'm going to share directly from my journal the entry that I wrote the morning after our 1st night there. My prayer is that you will be encouraged by God's amazing faithfulness as I share how He comforted me.
From my journal: "The Lord has already blessed me so much since I arrived at Horn Creek. I continue to miss Ty alot. I'm surrounded by memories of 23 years here with him. I can hear him telling me to drink lots of water and as I walk into my room I automatically drink a glass of water. When I first got here, Don and Linda Flack greeted me. They are the volunteer greeters here for the summer. They were also here with Ty, Wyatt, and I the 1st year we came. They hugged me and we cried together. Seeing my name without Ty's on the camper list was hard. I just hugged Wyatt and cried. It's like I know Ty isn't here and isn't coming back, but it still doesn't seem real. It was also great to see other friends and to find comfort as we hugged, cried and missed Ty. Jesus loved me so well through many special friends. Also, another blessing He provided was giving me a room in the mini-lodge instead of the cabins and not only just a room but our favorite room. I was reminded that God delights in me and loves to bless beyond what I could ask or imagine. Even though there are many lonely moments, I still feel "at home" here. The first night when I came into my room and shut the door the memories overwhelmed me and I repeated the words I've said often since Ty's death last October, "Lord, this is so hard." I missed Ty so much and just wanted him to be here with me. As always, I cried out to Jesus and ask Him to hold me close. I told Him again that I don't understand why Ty and I couldn't have more years together, but I trust His perfect plan and know that He isn't finished with me here. As I got ready for bed I could just feel His presence with me and was not at all surprised when I picked up a devotional from David Jeremiah's ministry and read "Behold, I am with you and will keep you WHEREVER you go...I will not leave you." Genesis 28:15. I thought, WOW, Lord you couldn't be more clear. Just like you are with me everyday back home, you are with me here. In the devotional, Susanna Wesley talks about trials. She says that in God's providence even her burdens have become blessings, "All my sufferings have occurred to promote my spiritual and eternal good." The devotional goes on to say that we have a God who admirably manages our lives with His all powerful greatness. That's why we grow more spiritually during trials than any other time in life. Our self-sufficiency is brought low and our reliance on God becomes great. The quote at the end put the icing on the cake--"For come what may, from day to day my Heavenly Father watches over me." I just laid down the devotional and was in total awe of God, but that wasn't all He had for me. I picked up the Horn Creek devotional. Some verses from Isaiah 64 say "Since ancient times no one has heard, no ear has perceived, no eye has seen any God besides you who acts on behalf of those who WAIT for Him. I wrote,"God, You are amazing, faithful, and wonderful. What would I do without you? You always give me exactly what I need as I run to you. I thanked Him and ask Him to hold and comfort me and then I went to sleep.
There were many more blessings that week as I continually chose to abide in Jesus, to run to Him not away from Him. Psalm 91 is a wonderful reminder of God's nearness and care for us. Charles Spurgeon has said of Psalm 91,"The blessings here are not for all believers but for those who live in CLOSE FELLOWSHIP with God."
Kris Goertzen in her study on humility says: "That's all a God-centered woman wants --nearness to God. No pretending, that just leaves us empty. No masks, that leaves us weary. We want the nearness of God! that alone satisfies." I totally agree with what Kris says as she asks, "Do you long for deep relationships and intimacy? Searching to have these voids filled can be fearfully destructive. I'd like to save you a lifetime of pain by telling you the real truth. You won't find it in friends or in husbands, by getting your way or by getting more stuff. The great Thomas Watson said, 'Walking with God is the best way to know the mind of God; friends who walk together impart their secrets to one another.'" Kris ends with "Wow, walking through life together with God, the One who knows me and loves me perfectly. The One I can trust fully, who will never hurt or disappoint me. That's intimacy."
That intimacy comes from abiding in Jesus. It's believing everything that He says in His Word. If He said it, I believe it, and it's because of that intimate, trusting relationship that I have with Him that I can wake up each morning choosing to rejoice in Him whether I feel like it or not. I can rely on Him to give me joy, peace, and strength because that's what He promises in His Word and I believe Him!!!
Jesus is my everything. I truly can't face a day without Him. The song below expresses exactly how I feel. I get teary every time I listen to it because I am so thankful for Jesus and the unbelievable strength and peace that He gives me everyday. Many people have ask me how I have continued on with such joy and purpose--the answer to that is Jesus' power in me. I could never make it without Him. My prayer for each of you is that you will seek Him and rest in Him today. Remember, He delights in you and desires an intimate relationship with you. He will meet your every need. I speak from experience when I say that NOTHING the world has to offer compares to a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. He is worthy of your complete trust!
Jesus is my everything. I truly can't face a day without Him. The song below expresses exactly how I feel. I get teary every time I listen to it because I am so thankful for Jesus and the unbelievable strength and peace that He gives me everyday. Many people have ask me how I have continued on with such joy and purpose--the answer to that is Jesus' power in me. I could never make it without Him. My prayer for each of you is that you will seek Him and rest in Him today. Remember, He delights in you and desires an intimate relationship with you. He will meet your every need. I speak from experience when I say that NOTHING the world has to offer compares to a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. He is worthy of your complete trust!
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Freedom in Jesus
Thinking about our theme on freedom this month drew my thoughts back to rest which interestingly was the theme from last month. Freedom to me means choosing to rest in Jesus all the time no matter what the circumstances are around me.
Recently I had yet another opportunity to choose to either rest in Jesus and find freedom or ignore Him, feel sorry for myself, and give in to the loneliness. Over and over again, I'm reminded that I have a choice to either believe Jesus' promises or not.
This particular time came as I headed home from Wyatt and Laurel's house. I had the privilege of staying with Preston, my 15 1/2 old grandson, for a few days while they were in Colorado. Preston and "Nana" (he can say Nana now, and it melts my heart!) had a wonderful time. It brought back so many memories of those special times with my boys at that age. Reading books, playing, singing and laughing together brought such joy. I'm sure he thought his Nana was pretty silly--I'm such a kid at heart. It was so fun to pray for him while I was with him and wonder what the Lord has planned for my precious little grandson. Anyway, being with him was one of those extra-special blessings from Jesus that I've spoken of often in my blogs--something I will treasure for a long time.
Then it was time to say good-bye and head home. That's when the loneliness for Ty hit again.The tears came as I started home. At that point, I could choose freedom in God's promises or bondage in bitterness. I chose to cry out to Jesus and trust in His promises. He brought these to mind as I talked to Him:
"I will never leave you or forsake you."
"For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
"And we know that all things work together for good for those who are called according to His purpose."
There were many more He brought to my mind. But the question is, do I believe those promises? Yes, definitely. Do I always feel like they're true? No, but I just keep sharing my heart with my Heavenly Father just like I would have with Ty or a close friend. God is my counselor, protector, and friend. According to His Word, He is also my husband. (Isaiah 54:4,5). Now, since I no longer have Ty to talk to and go to for wisdom and encouragement, I go to the Lord even more. EVERY TIME I choose to seek Him and rely on Him, He gives me peace and joy. Many people ask me how I can have peace and joy in the midst of such loss and sorrow. Honestly, I can't. That comes from Jesus and from Him alone.
Another choice I had as I drove home was to either rejoice as God's Word says (Philippians 4:4) or to complain. I chose to rejoice and thank my Heavenly Father for my current life without Ty. Again, did I feel like rejoicing? No. At the same time I was rejoicing I was also very honest in sharing with the Lord how hard this life is without Ty. I told Him that I would rather be at home with Him and Ty in heaven, but I also agreed with Him that He knows far better than I do what's best for me.
I share these things to encourage those of you who are experiencing much suffering and loss right now. Jesus is there for you too. He's waiting patiently for you to come and talk to Him. He's the best friend you will ever have! When you pray, just be yourself. He loves you just as you are and will give you exactly what you need as you trust Him. That's what He did for me that evening when I got home. Since my love language is words of encouragement I asked Him for some encouraging words. He faithfully brought those words from an article from Dr. David Jeremiah who says, "God will care for us during our time on this earth then He promises to take us to an eternal home where all sorrow is gone and all joy is ours." YEA! (John 14:1-3; Revelation 21:3-4) Just as I mentioned earlier about the importance of believing God's promises--Dr. Jeremiah also said "God makes the promises, but we have to claim them. A promise not claimed and acted upon has the same practical effect as a promise never made. If I promise to help you whenever you call me, but you never call, you never receive the benefit of my promise. God is the Promise Maker. I am the promise claimer."
"All of God's promises are rooted in His character. For instance, 'I will never leave you or forsake you' (Hebrews 13:5) is an explicit promise to all Christians. But God's promise directly to the apostle Paul--"My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9) --is also an implicit promise to believers. Paul spoke for all of us when he said, 'For when I am weak, then I am strong (in Christ). If the power of Christ was available to Paul, it is likewise available to us."
The strength that people see in me comes only from Jesus. In and of myself, I am so weak. It's His strength that keeps me going each day. Dr. Jeremiah's article ended with a truth that is becoming more and more apparent to me everyday; "when we have Jesus Christ we have all we need." And two other encouraging statements the Lord gave me that evening were:
"Instead of kicking the obstacles in your path or picking them up and carrying them, use them to climb higher with God's help." and
"Pain purifies. Pain draws the Christian closer to Jesus Christ. God does not promise to remove our pain, or even to relieve our pain; but He does promise to transform it and use it for His eternal purposes."
As always, my loving Heavenly Father, husband and friend is faithful. There is no greater freedom than trusting Him and knowing that He loves me and will take care of me.
In these uncertain times, I trust that the music video below with the verses
and beautiful pictures of God's creation will renew your hope. Jesus is everything to me; I pray that He is everything to you too. Watch the video a couple times--first to listen to the song and then to read all the verses--they are so encouraging.
Recently I had yet another opportunity to choose to either rest in Jesus and find freedom or ignore Him, feel sorry for myself, and give in to the loneliness. Over and over again, I'm reminded that I have a choice to either believe Jesus' promises or not.
This particular time came as I headed home from Wyatt and Laurel's house. I had the privilege of staying with Preston, my 15 1/2 old grandson, for a few days while they were in Colorado. Preston and "Nana" (he can say Nana now, and it melts my heart!) had a wonderful time. It brought back so many memories of those special times with my boys at that age. Reading books, playing, singing and laughing together brought such joy. I'm sure he thought his Nana was pretty silly--I'm such a kid at heart. It was so fun to pray for him while I was with him and wonder what the Lord has planned for my precious little grandson. Anyway, being with him was one of those extra-special blessings from Jesus that I've spoken of often in my blogs--something I will treasure for a long time.
Then it was time to say good-bye and head home. That's when the loneliness for Ty hit again.The tears came as I started home. At that point, I could choose freedom in God's promises or bondage in bitterness. I chose to cry out to Jesus and trust in His promises. He brought these to mind as I talked to Him:
"I will never leave you or forsake you."
"For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
"And we know that all things work together for good for those who are called according to His purpose."
There were many more He brought to my mind. But the question is, do I believe those promises? Yes, definitely. Do I always feel like they're true? No, but I just keep sharing my heart with my Heavenly Father just like I would have with Ty or a close friend. God is my counselor, protector, and friend. According to His Word, He is also my husband. (Isaiah 54:4,5). Now, since I no longer have Ty to talk to and go to for wisdom and encouragement, I go to the Lord even more. EVERY TIME I choose to seek Him and rely on Him, He gives me peace and joy. Many people ask me how I can have peace and joy in the midst of such loss and sorrow. Honestly, I can't. That comes from Jesus and from Him alone.
Another choice I had as I drove home was to either rejoice as God's Word says (Philippians 4:4) or to complain. I chose to rejoice and thank my Heavenly Father for my current life without Ty. Again, did I feel like rejoicing? No. At the same time I was rejoicing I was also very honest in sharing with the Lord how hard this life is without Ty. I told Him that I would rather be at home with Him and Ty in heaven, but I also agreed with Him that He knows far better than I do what's best for me.
I share these things to encourage those of you who are experiencing much suffering and loss right now. Jesus is there for you too. He's waiting patiently for you to come and talk to Him. He's the best friend you will ever have! When you pray, just be yourself. He loves you just as you are and will give you exactly what you need as you trust Him. That's what He did for me that evening when I got home. Since my love language is words of encouragement I asked Him for some encouraging words. He faithfully brought those words from an article from Dr. David Jeremiah who says, "God will care for us during our time on this earth then He promises to take us to an eternal home where all sorrow is gone and all joy is ours." YEA! (John 14:1-3; Revelation 21:3-4) Just as I mentioned earlier about the importance of believing God's promises--Dr. Jeremiah also said "God makes the promises, but we have to claim them. A promise not claimed and acted upon has the same practical effect as a promise never made. If I promise to help you whenever you call me, but you never call, you never receive the benefit of my promise. God is the Promise Maker. I am the promise claimer."
"All of God's promises are rooted in His character. For instance, 'I will never leave you or forsake you' (Hebrews 13:5) is an explicit promise to all Christians. But God's promise directly to the apostle Paul--"My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9) --is also an implicit promise to believers. Paul spoke for all of us when he said, 'For when I am weak, then I am strong (in Christ). If the power of Christ was available to Paul, it is likewise available to us."
The strength that people see in me comes only from Jesus. In and of myself, I am so weak. It's His strength that keeps me going each day. Dr. Jeremiah's article ended with a truth that is becoming more and more apparent to me everyday; "when we have Jesus Christ we have all we need." And two other encouraging statements the Lord gave me that evening were:
"Instead of kicking the obstacles in your path or picking them up and carrying them, use them to climb higher with God's help." and
"Pain purifies. Pain draws the Christian closer to Jesus Christ. God does not promise to remove our pain, or even to relieve our pain; but He does promise to transform it and use it for His eternal purposes."
As always, my loving Heavenly Father, husband and friend is faithful. There is no greater freedom than trusting Him and knowing that He loves me and will take care of me.
In these uncertain times, I trust that the music video below with the verses
and beautiful pictures of God's creation will renew your hope. Jesus is everything to me; I pray that He is everything to you too. Watch the video a couple times--first to listen to the song and then to read all the verses--they are so encouraging.
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Jesus--My Rest
REST for me comes when I give all my concerns to Jesus and trust Him to take care of me. Jesus says in Matthew 11:28: "Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you Rest." Busyness is the killer of relationships and also of REST. The world tells us to work all the time so that we can earn more money to buy more stuff which we don't have time to enjoy because we're always working. Why not work less and be content with what you already have and be able to enjoy what really matters--your relationship with Jesus and with family and friends?
I used to believe that more stuff would make me happy and content but instead it only made me want more stuff--this obsessive cycle never stops. Contentment and REST only come when Jesus becomes our obsession. Only He can meet our needs and fill the hole in our hearts that we try to fill up with other things. When I am content, I naturally rejoice in Him more and thank Him for all the little blessings such as my yummy morning coffee, breakfast with friends, time with my family, walks in the country with my dog, Shea, a funny movie, a good book, an encouraging note, beautiful flowers, freshly mowed grass, the birds singing, etc. We have so many things to be thankful for. After my husband Tyler was diagnosed with cancer, we did slow down and enjoy God's blessings so much more. Don't wait until until a cancer diagnosis to relax and enjoy what really matters.
In order to REST in Jesus you have to love Him and in order to love Him you have to understand how much He loves you. I have the following words written (source unknown) in my Bible. Hopefully they will encourage you as they have me.
"Our love for God is always in direct relation to our perception of His love for us. He passionately pursues you and me to sweep us off our feet and convince us of His incredible love. How much does He love us? Enough to die for us. This image tells us of the incredible love of Jesus for you and me. He could have escaped the pain of the cross, and He could have annihilated the entire planet in an instant, but He endured the suffering to glorify God and demonstrate His love for us. The love of God is not just a principle or a theory. It is a powerful life-changing commitment by God to bring us into His arms and restore us to a love relationship with Him."
How awesome is that? What could bring more REST than understanding how much Jesus loves us. Since Ty was diagnosed with cancer over three years ago and went home to be with Jesus last October, I can certainly testify to Jesus' love and faithfulness. I could not have made it without Him. I miss Ty so much and wish every day that he would walk back into my life, but Jesus continues to be more than enough. I am amazed each day at the peace--Philippians 4:7 "And the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus"--and joy that He gives me as I choose to rejoice in Him and praise Him. As hard as it is for me to continue on here without Ty, I REST in Jesus' perfect plan for me. He gave me encouragement this morning in Habakkuk 3:18-19. "Yet I will rejoice in the Lord. I will be joyful in God my Savior. The Sovereign Lord is my strength; He makes my feet like the feet of a deer, He enables me to go on the heights." The commentary further explains:
"Habakkuk had asked God why evil people prosper while the righteous suffer. God's answer: they don't, not in the long run. Habakkuk saw his own limitations in contrast to God's unlimited control of all the world's events. We cannot see all that God is doing, and we cannot see all that God will do, but we can be assured that He is God and will do what is right. Knowing this can give us confidence and hope in a confusing world."
Yes, we all face an uncertain future, but we can REST in our unchanging Savior and God. Keep seeking Him. He is forever faithful.
The song below by musical group 'Phillips, Craig and Dean' sums up the recent past for me. I stand in awe of my Savior, Jesus. I'm so thankful for His faithfulness to me. As the song says: "Jesus, I am so in love with You."
I used to believe that more stuff would make me happy and content but instead it only made me want more stuff--this obsessive cycle never stops. Contentment and REST only come when Jesus becomes our obsession. Only He can meet our needs and fill the hole in our hearts that we try to fill up with other things. When I am content, I naturally rejoice in Him more and thank Him for all the little blessings such as my yummy morning coffee, breakfast with friends, time with my family, walks in the country with my dog, Shea, a funny movie, a good book, an encouraging note, beautiful flowers, freshly mowed grass, the birds singing, etc. We have so many things to be thankful for. After my husband Tyler was diagnosed with cancer, we did slow down and enjoy God's blessings so much more. Don't wait until until a cancer diagnosis to relax and enjoy what really matters.
In order to REST in Jesus you have to love Him and in order to love Him you have to understand how much He loves you. I have the following words written (source unknown) in my Bible. Hopefully they will encourage you as they have me.
"Our love for God is always in direct relation to our perception of His love for us. He passionately pursues you and me to sweep us off our feet and convince us of His incredible love. How much does He love us? Enough to die for us. This image tells us of the incredible love of Jesus for you and me. He could have escaped the pain of the cross, and He could have annihilated the entire planet in an instant, but He endured the suffering to glorify God and demonstrate His love for us. The love of God is not just a principle or a theory. It is a powerful life-changing commitment by God to bring us into His arms and restore us to a love relationship with Him."
How awesome is that? What could bring more REST than understanding how much Jesus loves us. Since Ty was diagnosed with cancer over three years ago and went home to be with Jesus last October, I can certainly testify to Jesus' love and faithfulness. I could not have made it without Him. I miss Ty so much and wish every day that he would walk back into my life, but Jesus continues to be more than enough. I am amazed each day at the peace--Philippians 4:7 "And the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus"--and joy that He gives me as I choose to rejoice in Him and praise Him. As hard as it is for me to continue on here without Ty, I REST in Jesus' perfect plan for me. He gave me encouragement this morning in Habakkuk 3:18-19. "Yet I will rejoice in the Lord. I will be joyful in God my Savior. The Sovereign Lord is my strength; He makes my feet like the feet of a deer, He enables me to go on the heights." The commentary further explains:
"Habakkuk had asked God why evil people prosper while the righteous suffer. God's answer: they don't, not in the long run. Habakkuk saw his own limitations in contrast to God's unlimited control of all the world's events. We cannot see all that God is doing, and we cannot see all that God will do, but we can be assured that He is God and will do what is right. Knowing this can give us confidence and hope in a confusing world."
Yes, we all face an uncertain future, but we can REST in our unchanging Savior and God. Keep seeking Him. He is forever faithful.
The song below by musical group 'Phillips, Craig and Dean' sums up the recent past for me. I stand in awe of my Savior, Jesus. I'm so thankful for His faithfulness to me. As the song says: "Jesus, I am so in love with You."
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Coffee with Jesus
As I was seeking direction for what God wanted me to share on prayer this month, He gave me this acrostic for PRAYER. Below are the things He takes me through every morning when I grab my cup of coffee, Bible and journal and sit down for a visit with Jesus.
P Praising God for His unconditional love, for sending His Son to die on the cross for my sins and for never leaving my side.
God's promise is: Hebrews 13:5
"Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you."
R Relying on Jesus when I don't have the strength to go on , and life seems so hard.
God's promise is: Philippians 4:13
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."
A Asking Jesus for wisdom when I don't know what to do next.
God's promise is: Proverbs 3:5-6
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your
ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths."
Y Yearning to know Jesus better and love Him more every day.
God's promise is: Jeremiah 29:13
"You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."
E Enjoying an intimate, personal relationship with Jesus that brings peace and hope even when my heart is breaking, and I long for my forever home in Heaven.
God's promise is: John 14:27
"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled, and do not be afraid."
R Remembering that I'm never alone even when I feel completely overwhelmed and lonely on this new journey without my husband, Ty.
God's promise is: Isaiah 41:13
"For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not
fear; I will help you."
Prayer for me is visiting with my Heavenly Father who is also my best friend. The visits are longer and more frequent now because I no longer have Ty here to visit with. Jesus fills the hole in my heart that Ty has left. It is such a blessing to visit with Jesus about everything. I choose to praise Him every morning when I wake up whether I feel like it or not. I go to Him when I'm weary and it is there that I find rest.
My favorite time of the day is those early morning visits when I have "coffee with Jesus". I share my heart with Him knowing that He is never too busy to listen. He loves me so much. From our visits together He gives me hope through the promises in His Word. Those same promises gave Ty and I strength to keep going each day during the 2 1/2 year cancer journey and continue to bring me hope and encouragement each day now. I am so thankful for my Savior. He is forever faithful.
I leave you with a video of the song, Praise you in this Storm. It was a song that Ty and I listened to often, especially on the really tough days. It always helped us to continue to praise our Lord and rest in Him. I heard it again this week and wanted to share it with you. I hope it will encourage each of you as you face storms in your own lives. At one point the song says, "Every tear I've cried, You held in your hand. You never left my side". Know this is true for you just as it has been true for me.
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