Have been reading back through my journal this month and it sure is hard to choose what to share. Jesus is always teaching me something good. I ended my blog with you last month sharing about some special verses in I Thessalonians 5:16-18: "Be joyful always, pray continually and be thankful in all circumstances for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." Interestingly those were the verses that Dr. Jeremiah used in his devotional for March. He has a number of articles that he wrote about these verses. That brings me to this entry in my journal on March 18.
Spent time reading through Dr. Jeremiah's articles on I Thessalonians 5:16-18. Those are the verses the Lord specifically led me to after Yance and Elaine's wedding when I was extremely lonely for Ty and had been asking Him--"Lord, what is your will for me." He answered so clearly and those verses have been such a foundation for me. So many times when I have been desperate for what to do next, been wanting to give up, been lonely and hurting--I have chosen to obey His Words to me in those verses. He then gives me just what I need to take the next step, even if it's just a baby step, to keep on going. I still marvel at how personally and intimately He meets my need and speaks to my heart. I will always remember so clearly the heaviness of my heart on that morning, the morning after Yance and Elaine's wedding. Yance had stayed in my hotel room with me the night before and I will always treasure that time. We talked about Ty and how much we missed him and how hard it was to understand why he couldn't be with us to share in this most important time in Yance's life. Our hearts grieved because of that but also rejoiced in our Savior, Jesus Christ and in knowing and trusting that His plan is ALWAYS the BEST even though it isn't always the easiest. We rejoiced that Ty was now in heaven with Jesus and no longer suffering from the cancer that took over his body. We also talked about our relationship as mother and son and how that would change the next day as he became Elaine's husband. As our Lord instructs us in His Word--once we marry we are to leave mother and father and cleave to our husband or wife. The Holy Spirit had been drawing us both closer to Jesus before Ty got cancer in preparation for that journey and we loved challenging each other in our walk with our Savior. We spent lots of time in conversations about what He was teaching us and how He was helping us through the cancer journey with Ty. We had leaned on each other as we also rested in Jesus during the cancer journey so that we could be strong to help Ty keep fighting. As we talked, cried and prayed together that night, I was so excited for the new journey that Yance would begin the next day with precious Elaine, but I also knew that our relationship would be different. His allegiance and focus would now be on Elaine. His heart would belong first to Jesus and then to her. That's why the morning after their wedding was particularly difficult for me and that I felt so lonely. When Wyatt and Laurel got married Ty was still here and it was easier to let go because I still had him and Jesus to lean on. Now I just had Jesus and YES--He is enough, but I longed for and was very lonesome for that human companionship with Ty. So...my Lord's very specific words to me from I Thess. brought me much hope as He very specifically gave me instructions in what to do that morning when I truly didn't have the strength to take the next step on my new journey with Him. As I poured out my heart to Him and chose to be joyful and thankful for all His many blessings and promises, He brought joy to my heart and gave me His strength in my weakness. It's been fun to be reminded of these verses again in not only Dr. Jeremiah's devotional but also in the Bible study that we're doing in Lovely Branches. His timing is always perfect. As we near the opening of Taste and See Coffee House, He knew I needed to be reminded to be joyful, pray continually and to be thankful in the midst of being overwhelmed by all the preparations, decisions and things to learn before opening day. Again, it's not about me or us (the Lovely Branches Ministries Board) and our abilities--it's all about Jesus and relying on Him to lead and guide us in the way we should go as well as to TRUST Him to direct our paths. We can't do this in our strength, but we can do all things through Him who gives us strength. In and of myself, I'm scared to death of trying to remember how to make all the drinks, run the equipment, bake somewhere other than my kitchen, etc...but Jesus continually asks me: "Keva, do you trust Me? I have promised to do immeasurably more that you can ask or imagine. Come to me and REST--be joyful, pray continually and be thankful. Take my hand and I will lead you and give you exactly what you need to accomplish what I have called you to do!!!"
Yes, I was quite panicked after our first lesson on how to use the espresso machine. There were too many variables for my very concrete mind. I was sure that Jesus didn't intend for me to make the espresso--that I could do everything else. Well, very patiently He reminded me that fear does not come from Him and that I certainly wasn't resting and trusting in Him to help me. So... I chose to trust Him to help me and now feel much more comfortable with the machine. Now I sure wouldn't say that we're great buddies yet--I much prefer making smoothies and freezes--but I'm no longer panicked and am willing to learn. Taste and See Coffee House opened on March 25, and it has been fun to serve lots of yummy drinks and baked goods as well as to share Jesus love and compassion. It's another new journey for me on this road without Ty. I missed having him here to be excited with me as well as to encourage me when I was feeling overwhelmed. The neat thing is that he knew about the coffee house dream that Jesus gave us. He would be so excited and if he were here would have been one of the first ones in requesting that I make him a latte so I could practice!!
As far as the clothing fast goes--I'm too busy to think about shopping. I was pondering this morning which of my "old" dresses to wear on Easter. In doing so, I realized how thankful and content I am with all that I have. I wrote this is my journal on March 19: When Jesus is our HOPE and FOCUS, our needs are met and our wants become less and less. I'm finding that my desire for more things is truly diminishing. What I truly want more of is more of Jesus--to know Him better. The more time I spend in His Word as well as reading stories about what He's doing in the lives of others, the more I want to know Him.
That continues to be my prayer for each of you--that you would hunger and thirst for more of Jesus because He is the BEST and the ANSWER for all the deepest needs of your heart. I know that I say that so much here, but it's just the TRUTH. He's loves you so much--seek Him, make Him your #1 priority above everything else. I promise that you will not be disappointed and will find true peace and freedom!!!
As you watch the following video and listen to Jeremy Camp's song: "In His Presence", I pray that you and I will choose each day to rejoice in His love for us and to be thankful for His willingness to suffer and die for our sins so that we can have an intimate personal relationship with Him. WOW! What a blessing to be a child of the KING!!!
