More Of Jesus

I trust that each of you had a peaceful Christmas as you rested in and focused on Jesus. My sons, Wyatt and Yance as well as my daughter's-in-law, Laurel and Elaine and my precious grandson, Preston were all here for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. We all missed Ty, but Jesus blessed us with a very special time together as well as with extended family and friends.

Thinking of the new year, I'm reminded that every day is a new beginning. No matter what happened or didn't happen yesterday, I can choose to wake up praising Jesus for His unconditional love and trust Him to give me strength for that day. Granted, I don't always wake up feeling like praising Jesus. Yesterday was one of those days. I don't know how many times I said, "Jesus, help me" throughout the day. He did help me as I chose to rejoice and talk to Him even though I didn't feel like it.

I went to Hutchinson last night to celebrate Christmas with Ty's Grandma Farney and other family. She and Ty shared a Christmas Eve birthday, and she is 99 years old this year. They shared many birthdays together as we would all meet at Ty's parents for breakfast to celebrate their special day. Anyway, it was a very fun evening, but I was feeling quite lonely as I headed home. The first thing I said when I got in my car was "Lord, I miss Ty so much." Then I turned on the radio and heard Dr. Stanley say that we need to be strong and courageous like Joshua. He went on to share from Joshua 1 as I drove home. When I got home and looked up the passage it was such an encouragement and reminder of how to begin the new year that I want to share it here.

Starting in Joshua 1:5 God says to Joshua "No one will be able to stand up against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses so I will be with you, I will never leave you nor forsake you. BE STRONG AND COURAGEOUS because you will lead these people to inherit the land I swore to their forefathers to give them. BE STRONG AND VERY COURAGEOUS. Be careful to obey all the law my servant Moses gave you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left, that you may be successful wherever you go. Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth, meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. Have I not commanded you? BE STRONG AND COURAGEOUS. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."

As we all face new challenges and new beginnings in the New Year, God will go with us just like He went with Joshua. It was so great to be reminded of that. The life application helps from my Bible say: "Joshua's new job consisted of leading more that two million people into a strange new land and conquering it. What a challenge--even for a man of Joshua's caliber. Every new job is a challenge. Without God, it can be frightening. With God it can be a great adventure. Just as God was with Joshua, He is with us as we face challenges. We may not conquer nations, but every day we face tough situations, difficult people and temptations. God promises, however, that He will never abandon us or fail to help us. By asking God to direct us we can conquer many of like's challenges. Many people think that prosperity and success come from having power, influential personal contacts, and a relentless desire to get ahead, but the prospect of prosperity that God taught Joshua goes against such criteria. He said to succeed Joshua must

(1) BE STRONG AND COURAGEOUS because the task ahead would not be easy.

(2) obey God's law, and

(3) constantly read and study the Book of the Law--God's Word.

To be successful, follow God's word's to Joshua. You may not succeed by the world's standards, but you will be a success in God's eyes--and His opinion is most important."

We need to commit everything to our Lord and Savior--our goals, ambitions, dreams, money, talents, time, health, and relationships. We need to commit to studying His Word everyday in order to get to know Him better, and we need to make glorifying Him our #1 purpose in life. As my pastor, Jim Dillon, said last Sunday, "When we make Jesus our first priority all the secondary things bring much more joy and blessing."

As Pastor Jim challenged us, I challenge you in this New Year to pray for the most important thing--more of Jesus. He promises in Jeremiah 29:13, "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." Life is hard, but God is ALWAYS faithful. I pray that as we begin and continue through this new year that we will become completely faithful in complete commitment to our Faithful God.

The following song was the first one I listened to as I was looking for one to share. It even had a line in it especially for me, that His love brings faith to the widow! I trust that it will bless you as you are reminded of God's love for you and how His love does bring peace, faith, and hope. As He keeps reminding me: He needs to be enough for each of us.

Jesus--The Greatest Gift

Peace, Rest, Quietness. Is that what you're experiencing during this Christmas season? During this very busy time, it's easy to be distracted by the things of this world. We can easily focus on having everything perfect from the perfectly decorated home, the perfect Christmas party, getting and giving perfect gifts and the list goes on and on. Instead our focus should be on the greatest gift--Jesus. As I mentioned last month, I was struggling, discouraged and feeling sorry for myself, but as I chose to focus on Jesus and rejoice and be thankful in spite of my feelings, He gave me peace, comfort and rest.

Recently the Lord has given me much encouragement in the book of Isaiah. Isaiah 30:15 says: "In repentance (turning away from my sin) and rest is your salvation, in quietness (at peace, to lie still, be undisturbed) and trust (confidence in who God is and what He can do) is your strength." The application helps from my Bible say: "He will give us the strength to face our difficulties. We should lay aside our busy care and endless effort and allow Him to act." He doesn't want us to be stressed this month as we prepare for His birthday. He wants us to rest in Him and allow Him to help us instead of trying to do everything on our own while hardly thinking of Him at all. Isaiah 26:3 says: "You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you." Again, from the application helps in my Bible: "We can never avoid strife in the world around us, but with God we can know perfect peace even in turmoil. When we are devoted to Him, our whole attitude is steady and stable. Supported by God's unchanging love and mighty power, we are not shaken by the surrounding chaos. Do you want peace? Keep your thoughts on and your trust in God." Choosing to rejoice in Him and praise Him is so important. Oswald Chambers says: "our state of mind is powerful in it's effects. It can be the enemy that penetrates right into our soul and distracts our mind from God. It is incredible what enormous power there is in simple things to distract our attention away from God. Refuse to be swamped by 'the cares of the world'."

During this Christmas season, many struggle with loneliness, discouragement, unmet expectations, stress, etc... I would encourage you to go to Isaiah 41:10,13 often to be reminded of God's promises to strengthen you and help you. "So do not fear, for I am with you, do not be dismayed for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you." How awesome is that--God promises to take our hand and help us, but we have to reach out to Him. I want to choose to do that every minute of every day and to make this Christmas all about Him and loving and caring for others instead of being stressed by the never-ending "perfect Christmas to-do list."

The entry for today in the wonderful little book, Jesus Calling says so well what Jesus has been doing in my life since my husband, Ty, went home to be with Him: "Let Me infuse My peace into your intermost being. As you sit quietly in the Light of My Presence, you can sense Peace growing within you. This is not something that you accomplish through self discipline and willpower; it is opening yourself to receive My blessing.

In this age of independence, people find it hard to acknowledge their neediness. However, I have taken you along a path that has highlighted your need for Me: placing you in situations where your strengths were irrelevant and your weaknesses were glaringly evident. Through the aridity of those desert marches, I have drawn you closer and closer to Myself. You have discovered flowers of Peace blossoming in the most desolate places. You have learned to thank me for hard times and difficult journeys, trusting that through them I accomplish My best work. You have realized that needing Me is the key to knowing Me intimately which is the gift above all gifts."

I pray that each of you will experience intimacy with Jesus this Christmas season as you seek to get to know Him better each day. The peace He gives far exceeds anything this world has to offer. An intimate relationship with Jesus truly is the BEST GIFT of all.

The following song, Here With Me by Mercy Me reminds us of the love of Jesus for each one of us. I loved the verses as well as the pictures on the video. As the song says, I hope that you will feel His presence and be caught up in the wonders of His touch this Christmas.

Thankful for God's Faithfulness

Honestly, my heart is breaking right now. I don't feel like writing this blog or doing anything else for that matter. And yet... the title of my blog is "Hope in Jesus". Can I still have hope in Jesus when I am hurting and would just like to snap my fingers and be in heaven with Jesus and Ty? Even though I don't "feel" hopeful, I can choose to go back to His Word and be reminded of His faithfulness in Psalm 33:4:

"For the word of the Lord is right and true; He is faithful in all He does."

I can also choose to go back to my journals and read of His faithfulness time after time. I just want to be very transparent with you and let you see that life is hard and many, many times I have to cry out to my Heavenly Father and express my feelings of hurt, loneliness and despair and ask Him to give me hope again. Interestingly enough, that is where I was at most of this past week-end.

Last month I shared a verse the Lord gave me from I Thessalonians 5:16-18.

"Rejoice always, pray continually and give thanks in all circumstances for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."

Well...yesterday morning when I woke up I was feeling quite overwhelmed as I thought about facing another day and the upcoming winter months without Ty. I just wanted to pull the covers over my head and make life go away. I was again thankful that Ty and Yance got my dog, Shea, for me. I have to get up to take care of her and that includes taking her for a walk. That morning as we walked, I remembered the verse again and thanked God for the beautiful fall morning and for my family and many friends. I again was very honest in sharing my thoughts and feelings with Him. I asked Him to show me His glory and told Him that I could sure use a "God-wink" (special blessing from Him). Many times in the past, especially when Ty had cancer, He would send me a shooting star, but this particular morning the stars weren't very visible because of the full moon. I continued to walk and talk to Him, but I just didn't feel His closeness. Then, He directed me to look up and a star shot across the sky! It was so amazing. You need to understand that it has been a long time since He has blessed me with a God-wink in the form of a shooting star. He knows our hearts though, and knows when we desperately need a reminder that He hasn't forgotten about us. I praised Him again for His faithfulness as I headed back home and was even more amazed when I turned on the radio and heard the song, Wish You Were Here by Mark Harris. It made me cry as I could imagine Ty singing the words about holding onto Jesus until He takes me home. I thought, okay, I can do that. Life is so short, and I will soon be in heaven too. Again, the Lord knew what I needed and encouraged me with that song. I hope it will encourage you too as I have posted it at the bottom of this page.

You would think that after the blessings He gave me yesterday that I would be having a better day today. That's not how life works though. Each month that I write this blog, Satan tries to put me down and get me very discouraged. He doesn't want me to share about the hope I have in Jesus. That hope is there no matter how I feel. I am thankful for my friends and family who have walked this road with me since Ty's death in October of 2009. The prayers, cards, encouraging words and love have been a tremendous blessing. I especially enjoyed a very special time with my family last week-end (the first anniversary of Ty's going to his forever home with Jesus). We spent Saturday at the Wichita Zoo which was especially fun with my grandson, Preston. We all missed Ty but were glad we could be together and rejoice in our Lord's faithfulness to us this past year.

That faithfulness is what He reminded me of this morning as I read from the book, God As He Longs For You to See Him by Chip Ingram. As Chip says, "God wants us to pour out our hearts to Him to bring our problems, pain and failures to Him. That's what Jeremiah did and he found that no matter how dark or bad his circumstances, they did not match God's faithfulness."

Jeremiah wrote in Lamentations 3:21-24 "Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself,
The Lord is my portion; therefore, I will wait for Him."

Chip says: "We taste God's faithfulness when we begin to trust Him with our tomorrows and then watch to see what He does. Jeremiah learned to greet each day with an assurance that the Lord was his "portion"-- that God is the one solid, unmovable, reliable part of any day. No one delivers like He does. We must learn to place our hope in Christ--not in stuff, not in good health, not in the future, not in the stock market, not in the ups and downs of dating life or marriage. Every other basis for hope will let us down. Only in Christ do we find the secret to a life of unending joy and peace, because He is the only one who will come through for us 100 percent of the time in any and every situation forever."

A. W. Tozer writes: "Upon God's faithfulness rests our whole hope of future blessedness...only as we have complete assurance that He is faithful may we live in peace and look forward with assurance to the life to come."

I am thankful for God's faithfulness. I chose to share my heart with you here not because I felt like it at all but because I knew God wanted me to. He gave me the words and the songs to share. I hope that you are encouraged and you too will run to Him even when you don't feel like it because He is faithful and will never leave you or forsake you. I'll leave you with the song, My Redeemer is Faithful and True by Steven Curtis Chapman as well as the Mark Harris song I mentioned above.

Changing Seasons with An Unchanging God

The changing seasons are one of the things I have always loved about living in Kansas. I always look forward to each one, but fall is definitely my favorite. I have now experienced going through three of the seasons without Ty.

Last year as the fall season began, Ty was still here but shortly after that time, on October 17, he went to his forever home with Jesus. It's hard to believe that it has been almost a year--a year of walking with Jesus one day at a time--many times one minute at a time. It has been a very hard year but also an encouraging year as my Savior and Best Friend has always been there for me and has provided a refuge, security and peace that is so beyond my understanding. He has been faithful as I've continued to reach out to Him regardless of my feelings. My faith has grown stronger as I've experienced Him carrying me through this time and carrying my sons and their families too. Honestly, I feel very weak most of the time, but God's Word promises that when I am weak, He will give me strength. (II Corinthians 12:9.10). How awesome that in my weakness, Jesus is strong and He is glorified more and more as I choose to move forward in His strength.

Oswald Chambers says:

Faith must be tested because it can only become our intimate possession through conflict. The ultimate thing is confidence in Jesus. Believe steadfastly on Him and everything that challenges you will strengthen your faith. Faith is absolute TRUST in God--trust that will never imagine that He would forsake us. (Hebrews 13:5-6).

I continue to ask God what His will is for me. As hard as it is to be here without Ty, I know that He still has a plan for me. Recently, He lead me to these verses in I Thessalonians 5:16-18.

"Rejoice always, pray continuously, and give thanks in all circumstances for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."

Those verses are quite clear in telling me what I need to be doing. It's definitely not easy, but I want to CHOOSE every day to be joyful, pray (talk to Jesus) continually, and give thanks in ALL circumstances. As always, when I am obedient to what Jesus asks me to do, He is faithful to give me more peace, joy and contentment than I can imagine. In the devotional book, "Jesus Calling" I was encouraged as I read this morning,

"Relax in my everlasting arms. Your weakness is an opportunity to grow strong in awareness of My Almighty Presence. Look to Me and My sufficiency; rejoice in my radiant riches that are abundantly available to help you. Go gently through this day, leaning on me and enjoying My presence. Thank Me for your neediness, which is building trust-bonds between us. If you look back on your journey thus far, you can see that days of extreme weakness have been some of your most precious times. Memories of these days are richly interwoven with golden strands of My intimate presence."

How true that has been for me. In my weakest times, Jesus has revealed Himself more clearly. Believe me, the strength, joy and peace that you see in me come from Jesus. If it weren't for Him, I would have given into the grief and loneliness that overwhelmed me so often this past year since Ty died. When I am tempted to focus on all the years on this earth that I'm missing with Ty, I am reminded of God's eternal plan and encouraged by Connie Mitchell, a widow whose husband also died after they had been married only 28 years (the same as Ty and I). She said,

"God is clearing away my short-sightedness and helping me comprehend that He has a much bigger eternal plan than I can even imagine. He knows the end of the story and someday we will see the whole picture. In the meantime I am content to trust in His goodness and love for my family and for me."

God is good and I am thankful that He never changes. As the seasons continue to change, I'm going to choose to take His hand, to rest and rely on Him and to continue to trust Him one day at a time. I pray that each of you will do the same because I can promise you that as you do, He will be faithful!

Enjoy the beautiful pictures on the video as well as the words of the song, "Be Still and Know" by Steven Curtis Chapman. When I chose this song to share I was so excited when it mentioned God's faithfulness and that He never changes. He's amazing--He even provided the perfect song to finish my blog with!

Jesus' Continued Faithfulness

As fall approaches and school begins again, I asked the Lord this morning, "What have you been teaching me?"

Honestly, this month has been a very emotional one for me. My youngest son, Yance married his sweetheart, Elaine on August 14. The week-end was filled with much fun and excitement as we traveled to Oklahoma City and enjoyed spending time with family and friends. A special memory for me was having Yance stay in my room the night before the wedding. We talked, cried and prayed together until early in the morning. We missed Ty so much and yet the Lord gave us both a peace as we thought of him in heaven with Jesus.

The wedding was beautiful as Yance and Elaine gave glory to our Lord and Savior and were so excited to finally be married. As the wedding began I was so honored to be escorted to my seat by my two sons and was thankful for my Lord's strength as my heart ached for Ty. It was another step on the journey that the Lord has me on. I enjoyed every minute of the wedding and am so blessed to have two sons who are following their Dad's advice to love the Lord their God with all their heart, soul and mind. Not only that but I now have two very special daughters who love our sons and love Jesus too. Of course, I can't forget my grandson, Preston. I have so much to be thankful for.

However, at home after the wedding my emotions had changed. I didn't feel so thankful. I really didn't feel much at all other than I longed to be in heaven with Jesus and Ty. I cried out to Jesus even though I really didn't feel like it. He led me to read back through my journal from last November. I wasn't surprised that as I began reading from my journal and His Word that God continued to remind me of the hope I have in Him and all that I have to look forward to in my forever home in heaven.

Here are some highlights from that journal entry on November 15, 2009 (about a month after Ty died). Alot of my thoughts on that day were the same thoughts I had the week after the wedding. My prayer is that the things the Lord spoke to me will be an encouragement to you in whatever you're going through.

Date: November 15, 2009

"Jesus, thanks so much for loving me. Yesterday turned out to be a very difficult day. I missed Ty more than ever and the thought of getting up everyday for the rest of my life without him was overwhelming. Thanks for reminding me that you only ask me to take one day at a time and that you will give me strength for each day. I didn't feel your presence yesterday and yet as I was obedient to you and chose to read from your Word and hear your Word preached by Chip Ingram (www.lote.org) you reminded me of your promises:

that you haven't forgotten about me,

that you love me and

that I can count on you to walk with me side by side each new day for the rest of my life.

I choose to believe you when you say that you have plans for me, plans to prosper and not to harm me, plans to give me hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11); that you will work all things together for good for those who love you (Romans 8:28).

The best part of the day was when you showed yourself so abundantly as I was going to bed. Father, I was so lonesome then and as Chip had mentioned earlier, I should just cry out to you. That's what I did. I asked you to speak to me and you led me to the Voice of the Martyrs book- Extreme Devotion. The tears started as I remembered reading in it so many times on our way to the clinic when Ty had cancer. As I opened it to the place we had last read together, I read the verses that you had reminded me of already twice that day--from a friend and also on the radio: Romans 5:3-5 "Not only so but we also rejoice in our sufferings because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us because God has poured out His love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit whom He has given us." Ty and I went to that passage often during the cancer journey for encouragement and hope. It was like both you and Ty wanted to remind me to rejoice and hope in you. Ty and I often talked about the privilege it was to share in your sufferings, Lord, in order to bring more glory to you. It was and still isn't easy at all, but I'm so thankful for all you've taught me and continue to teach me about your love and faithfulness."

Later in the week He led me to Psalm 39. The theme of this Psalm is 'apart from God, life is fleeting and empty'. Verse 4 says:

"Show me, O Lord, my life's end and the number of my days, let me know how fleeting is my life. You have made my days a mere handbreadth; the span of my years is as nothing before you. Each man's life is but a breath. Man is a mere phantom as he goes to and fro; he bustles about but only in vain; he heaps up wealth, not knowing who will get it. But now, Lord, what do I look for? My hope is in you."

The commentary in my Bible says: "The brevity of life is a theme throughout the books of Psalms, Proverbs, and Ecclesiastes. Ironically people spend so much time securing their lives on earth and spend little or no thought about where they will spend eternity. David realized that amassing riches and busily accomplishing worldly tasks would make no difference in eternity. Few people understand that their only hope is in the Lord." Amen to that--nothing the world offers could give me the peace and strength that Jesus gives me each day as I depend on Him.

As I have read and studied and chosen to fill my mind with the truths of God's Word since coming home from Yance and Elaine's wedding, my Savior and Lord continues to teach me about the hope I have in Him. He wants me to continue to remind others of that hope and how much Jesus loves each one of us. The other thing He has been reminding me is that this world is not my home. It's okay to be homesick for my forever home in heaven, but He isn't finished with me here yet and wants me to choose each day to rejoice in Him and rely on Him minute by minute for strength to do whatever He asks me to do.


The following videos really encouraged me this week. They both are about heaven which seems to be on my mind alot these days. Actually, I know that we would all be happier and more content if we would focus on Jesus and our eternal home more than the things of the world. Remember, this world is not our home, we're just passing through. We have so much to look forward to in heaven with our Savior and Lord.

The Blessing of Abiding in Jesus

Abiding in Christ means trusting Him, reaching out to Him, choosing to run to Him and find peace and rest when life is so hard. As I pondered what the Lord would want me to share this month, He immediately brought to my mind a very hard evening on my recent vacation to Horn Creek, a family camp in Colorado. Ty and I and our boys have gone there every year (except for one) since 1986 when Wyatt(our oldest) was just 13 months old. I debated about going this year without Ty, but the Lord assured me that I wouldn't be alone--He would be with me. Wyatt, Laurel and Preston went too, as well as my mom. But--back to that evening that I mentioned earlier. I'm going to share directly from my journal the entry that I wrote the morning after our 1st night there. My prayer is that you will be encouraged by God's amazing faithfulness as I share how He comforted me.

From my journal: "The Lord has already blessed me so much since I arrived at Horn Creek. I continue to miss Ty alot. I'm surrounded by memories of 23 years here with him. I can hear him telling me to drink lots of water and as I walk into my room I automatically drink a glass of water. When I first got here, Don and Linda Flack greeted me. They are the volunteer greeters here for the summer. They were also here with Ty, Wyatt, and I the 1st year we came. They hugged me and we cried together. Seeing my name without Ty's on the camper list was hard. I just hugged Wyatt and cried. It's like I know Ty isn't here and isn't coming back, but it still doesn't seem real. It was also great to see other friends and to find comfort as we hugged, cried and missed Ty. Jesus loved me so well through many special friends. Also, another blessing He provided was giving me a room in the mini-lodge instead of the cabins and not only just a room but our favorite room. I was reminded that God delights in me and loves to bless beyond what I could ask or imagine. Even though there are many lonely moments, I still feel "at home" here. The first night when I came into my room and shut the door the memories overwhelmed me and I repeated the words I've said often since Ty's death last October, "Lord, this is so hard." I missed Ty so much and just wanted him to be here with me. As always, I cried out to Jesus and ask Him to hold me close. I told Him again that I don't understand why Ty and I couldn't have more years together, but I trust His perfect plan and know that He isn't finished with me here. As I got ready for bed I could just feel His presence with me and was not at all surprised when I picked up a devotional from David Jeremiah's ministry and read "Behold, I am with you and will keep you WHEREVER you go...I will not leave you." Genesis 28:15. I thought, WOW, Lord you couldn't be more clear. Just like you are with me everyday back home, you are with me here. In the devotional, Susanna Wesley talks about trials. She says that in God's providence even her burdens have become blessings, "All my sufferings have occurred to promote my spiritual and eternal good." The devotional goes on to say that we have a God who admirably manages our lives with His all powerful greatness. That's why we grow more spiritually during trials than any other time in life. Our self-sufficiency is brought low and our reliance on God becomes great. The quote at the end put the icing on the cake--"For come what may, from day to day my Heavenly Father watches over me." I just laid down the devotional and was in total awe of God, but that wasn't all He had for me. I picked up the Horn Creek devotional. Some verses from Isaiah 64 say "Since ancient times no one has heard, no ear has perceived, no eye has seen any God besides you who acts on behalf of those who WAIT for Him. I wrote,"God, You are amazing, faithful, and wonderful. What would I do without you? You always give me exactly what I need as I run to you. I thanked Him and ask Him to hold and comfort me and then I went to sleep.

There were many more blessings that week as I continually chose to abide in Jesus, to run to Him not away from Him. Psalm 91 is a wonderful reminder of God's nearness and care for us. Charles Spurgeon has said of Psalm 91,"The blessings here are not for all believers but for those who live in CLOSE FELLOWSHIP with God."

Kris Goertzen in her study on humility says: "That's all a God-centered woman wants --nearness to God. No pretending, that just leaves us empty. No masks, that leaves us weary. We want the nearness of God! that alone satisfies." I totally agree with what Kris says as she asks, "Do you long for deep relationships and intimacy? Searching to have these voids filled can be fearfully destructive. I'd like to save you a lifetime of pain by telling you the real truth. You won't find it in friends or in husbands, by getting your way or by getting more stuff. The great Thomas Watson said, 'Walking with God is the best way to know the mind of God; friends who walk together impart their secrets to one another.'" Kris ends with "Wow, walking through life together with God, the One who knows me and loves me perfectly. The One I can trust fully, who will never hurt or disappoint me. That's intimacy."

That intimacy comes from abiding in Jesus. It's believing everything that He says in His Word. If He said it, I believe it, and it's because of that intimate, trusting relationship that I have with Him that I can wake up each morning choosing to rejoice in Him whether I feel like it or not. I can rely on Him to give me joy, peace, and strength because that's what He promises in His Word and I believe Him!!!

Jesus is my everything. I truly can't face a day without Him. The song below expresses exactly how I feel. I get teary every time I listen to it because I am so thankful for Jesus and the unbelievable strength and peace that He gives me everyday. Many people have ask me how I have continued on with such joy and purpose--the answer to that is Jesus' power in me. I could never make it without Him. My prayer for each of you is that you will seek Him and rest in Him today. Remember, He delights in you and desires an intimate relationship with you. He will meet your every need. I speak from experience when I say that NOTHING the world has to offer compares to a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. He is worthy of your complete trust!

Freedom in Jesus

Thinking about our theme on freedom this month drew my thoughts back to rest which interestingly was the theme from last month. Freedom to me means choosing to rest in Jesus all the time no matter what the circumstances are around me.


Recently I had yet another opportunity to choose to either rest in Jesus and find freedom or ignore Him, feel sorry for myself, and give in to the loneliness. Over and over again, I'm reminded that I have a choice to either believe Jesus' promises or not.

This particular time came as I headed home from Wyatt and Laurel's house. I had the privilege of staying with Preston, my 15 1/2 old grandson, for a few days while they were in Colorado. Preston and "Nana" (he can say Nana now, and it melts my heart!) had a wonderful time. It brought back so many memories of those special times with my boys at that age. Reading books, playing, singing and laughing together brought such joy. I'm sure he thought his Nana was pretty silly--I'm such a kid at heart. It was so fun to pray for him while I was with him and wonder what the Lord has planned for my precious little grandson. Anyway, being with him was one of those extra-special blessings from Jesus that I've spoken of often in my blogs--something I will treasure for a long time.

Then it was time to say good-bye and head home. That's when the loneliness for Ty hit again.The tears came as I started home. At that point, I could choose freedom in God's promises or bondage in bitterness. I chose to cry out to Jesus and trust in His promises. He brought these to mind as I talked to Him:


"I will never leave you or forsake you."

"For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

"And we know that all things work together for good for those who are called according to His purpose."


There were many more He brought to my mind. But the question is, do I believe those promises? Yes, definitely. Do I always feel like they're true? No, but I just keep sharing my heart with my Heavenly Father just like I would have with Ty or a close friend. God is my counselor, protector, and friend. According to His Word, He is also my husband. (Isaiah 54:4,5). Now, since I no longer have Ty to talk to and go to for wisdom and encouragement, I go to the Lord even more. EVERY TIME I choose to seek Him and rely on Him, He gives me peace and joy. Many people ask me how I can have peace and joy in the midst of such loss and sorrow. Honestly, I can't. That comes from Jesus and from Him alone.

Another choice I had as I drove home was to either rejoice as God's Word says (Philippians 4:4) or to complain. I chose to rejoice and thank my Heavenly Father for my current life without Ty. Again, did I feel like rejoicing? No. At the same time I was rejoicing I was also very honest in sharing with the Lord how hard this life is without Ty. I told Him that I would rather be at home with Him and Ty in heaven, but I also agreed with Him that He knows far better than I do what's best for me.

I share these things to encourage those of you who are experiencing much suffering and loss right now. Jesus is there for you too. He's waiting patiently for you to come and talk to Him. He's the best friend you will ever have! When you pray, just be yourself. He loves you just as you are and will give you exactly what you need as you trust Him. That's what He did for me that evening when I got home. Since my love language is words of encouragement I asked Him for some encouraging words. He faithfully brought those words from an article from Dr. David Jeremiah who says, "God will care for us during our time on this earth then He promises to take us to an eternal home where all sorrow is gone and all joy is ours." YEA! (John 14:1-3; Revelation 21:3-4) Just as I mentioned earlier about the importance of believing God's promises--Dr. Jeremiah also said "God makes the promises, but we have to claim them. A promise not claimed and acted upon has the same practical effect as a promise never made. If I promise to help you whenever you call me, but you never call, you never receive the benefit of my promise. God is the Promise Maker. I am the promise claimer."


"All of God's promises are rooted in His character. For instance, 'I will never leave you or forsake you' (Hebrews 13:5) is an explicit promise to all Christians. But God's promise directly to the apostle Paul--"My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9) --is also an implicit promise to believers. Paul spoke for all of us when he said, 'For when I am weak, then I am strong (in Christ). If the power of Christ was available to Paul, it is likewise available to us."


The strength that people see in me comes only from Jesus. In and of myself, I am so weak. It's His strength that keeps me going each day. Dr. Jeremiah's article ended with a truth that is becoming more and more apparent to me everyday; "when we have Jesus Christ we have all we need." And two other encouraging statements the Lord gave me that evening were:

"Instead of kicking the obstacles in your path or picking them up and carrying them, use them to climb higher with God's help." and

"Pain purifies. Pain draws the Christian closer to Jesus Christ. God does not promise to remove our pain, or even to relieve our pain; but He does promise to transform it and use it for His eternal purposes."

As always, my loving Heavenly Father, husband and friend is faithful. There is no greater freedom than trusting Him and knowing that He loves me and will take care of me.

In these uncertain times, I trust that the music video below with the verses
and beautiful pictures of God's creation will renew your hope. Jesus is everything to me; I pray that He is everything to you too. Watch the video a couple times--first to listen to the song and then to read all the verses--they are so encouraging.